Masemauno
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 02-27-16, id: 7591431, Profile Updated: 10-30-18
Author has written 3 stories for Wheel of Time, Harry Potter, and Dungeons and Dragons.

Due to the planners' fallacy, no schedules will be given.

Things That Bug Me in Harry Potter Fanfiction.

1. Harry being made out to be equal in power to Dumbledore.

2. Harry being made out to be equal in power to Merlin.

3. Ron being Stupid instead of just lazy. I mean with his chess prowess, he cannot be stupid.

4. Using the Movie as canon over the book. Or worse, the video games.

5. Explaining where Sally-Anne Perks went.

Top Things That Make No Sense About the Potterverse

1. Why is Fudge in charge and how does the Ministry function?

2. Why is Harry so dense?

3. Why are there so many Deus ex machinas?

4. How does prophecy actually work?

5. What happened to Sally-Anne Perks?

I have deleted DND XHP due to writer's block and loss of materials.

"Does no one want a Redvine?! Has the world gone sane?!"

"Did you get mah text?"

"Yes."

"Well you didn't text me back."

"I don't want my life to be like Spiderman 3; I hated that movie!"

"Come on, let's go watch Wizards of Waverly Place."

"Look at my face, Remus. Do I look happy to you? Lupin got fired! Lupin got fired!"

"Everything tastes better with Redvines."

"Redvines. What the hell can't they do?"

"Bitch, I ain't Cho Chang!"

"Oh, this is all so illegal!"

"Oh, hey, Snape."

"You never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an idiot."

"Oh, God dammit, it's a text from Umbridge. 'We need to talk. Colon, right parenthesis."

"HAHAHAHAHA! Oh, I do not envy you. Oh, sorry, that's me. What the devil?! It's a BBM from Umbridge! 'Are you with Dumbledore? Did he get my text?' Now you've dragged me into this?!"

"Well, the first thing that came out of my mouth was 'AHHHHHHHHH!' Then I did the only thing that would make the whole situation less awkward for everyone. I disapperated."

"Oh, yeah, duh! Hermy-one's a butt!"

"Well, I broke a couple of my own rules, I suppose. Confessed my love for Lily Evans, I saved Harry Potter, and I made out with Grubbly-Plank again."

"It still refers to dementors as ring-wraiths."

"Well, if it isn't Harry f*ing Potter."

"I finally get to dance again, woohoo!"

"What the devil is going on here?!"

"I said it once, Snape, and I'll say it again. You always have been, and you always will be a butt-trumpet!"

"You're still a no good weiner-jacket."

"Tell me more about this Pigfarts, I find it to be very interesting."

"And now, thanks to you, we've been transported to this mystery location."

"Well, I don't find this surprising, at all."

"Who be disrespectin' Umbridge?! You gonna die, Shlongbottom!"

"Where did the poster of Headmaster Zefron go?"

"Malfoy, ya little shit!"

"Is okay good?"

"Quirrell, okay is wonderful."

"Did I do it so that people would like me? No, I hate people."

"When life sucks, just dance. And, since life always sucks, always dance."

"I can't go to Pigfarts, it's on Mars."

All of the previous quotes are from either AVPM, AVPS, or AVPSY

Copy and Paste if you love Starkid

You say Twilight, I say Harry Potter. You say vampires, I say wizards. You say Jacob Black, I say Sirius Black. You say Sam Uley, I say Remus Lupin. You say Team Edward, I say Team Potter. You say Robert Pattinson, I'll say 'is Cedric Diggory'. You think Bella and Edward is the Perfect dream couple? I think that's Lily and James.

Girls say vampires are sexy in their angst...but only after sacrificing all dignity and self-respect for sparkling in sunlight.

You say Edward, I'll say Harry; now STUPEFY!

Copy/Paste this if you agree that Harry Rules! And Twilight sucks!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy and paste this into your profile.

When Drowning…

Mortal: LIFEGUARD!

FMA fan: *claps hands and fails to transmute the water* "It's not working!"

HP fan: *Eats Gilly-weed*

When rain suddenly come…

Mortal: Damn it!

FMA fan: Time to cry about everything... Ow! my automail ports!!

HP fan: Accio umbrella!

When Exclaiming…

Mortal: Oh My god!

FMA fan: Holy Truth!, or Oh my Gate!

HP fan: Merlin’s pants!

When angry…

Mortal: Shut up!

FMA fan: STOP JERKING ME AROUND!!!!!

HP fan: Levicorpus!

FOR ALL THOSE WHO ADMIT TO BEING WEIRD AND ARE PROUD OF IT, COPY AND PASTE THE RABBIT ONTO YOUR PROFILES! ALL HAIL THOSE WHO ARE PROUD TO BE DIFFERENT!

Things to do in a shop when you are bored.

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of MM's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .

Do you love Lunar Harmony?

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Crumple Horned Plot Bunnies by Andrew Joshua Talon reviews
Random Harry Potter ideas that I haven't found a place for yet. But maybe, you can. Enjoy!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 44 - Words: 61,462 - Reviews: 477 - Favs: 341 - Follows: 299 - Updated: 22h - Published: 1/26/2010 - Harry P.
Ghosts of the Past by Nimbus Llewelyn reviews
Sequel to Child of the Storm. Harry's life has changed a lot over the past year, what with the return of his father, Thor, murder attempts by everything from HYDRA assassins to Elder Gods keeping him on his toes and making a few new friends. But while Chthon and HYDRA are gone, all sorts of dark things have been stirred up, things thought long gone. And guess who they're after...
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 68 - Words: 998,908 - Reviews: 4813 - Favs: 3,778 - Follows: 4,361 - Updated: 5/11 - Published: 7/12/2016
Harry Potter, Squatter by Enterprise1701-d reviews
Based on a challenge by Gabriel Herrol. A young Harry Potter is abandoned in new York by the Dursleys. He finds his way onto Olympus and starts squatting in an abandoned temple...
Crossover - Harry Potter & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 58 - Words: 520,791 - Reviews: 10731 - Favs: 17,404 - Follows: 19,832 - Updated: 5/8 - Published: 5/1/2019 - Harry P., Hestia
Harry Potter and the Prince of Slytherin by The Sinister Man reviews
Harry Potter was Sorted into Slytherin after a crappy childhood. His brother Jim is believed to be the BWL. Think you know this story? Think again. Year Four starts on 9/1/20. NO romantic pairings prior to Fourth Year. Basically good Dumbledore and Weasleys. Limited bashing (mainly of James).
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 155 - Words: 1,311,780 - Reviews: 18032 - Favs: 18,146 - Follows: 19,860 - Updated: 4/10 - Published: 4/17/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., Neville L., Theodore N.
Whiskey Time Travel by Sapper One reviews
When Unspeakable Harry Potter wakes up in 1978, he determines he's either A: In the past. Or B: In a mental hospital. At least the firewhiskey still tastes the same. Waiting tables at the Three Broomsticks, drunken death eater bar fights, annoying an attractive but pushy auror, and avoiding his mother's crush on him is just another day in the life of Harry Potter.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 39,295 - Reviews: 2291 - Favs: 13,320 - Follows: 16,539 - Updated: 3/5 - Published: 5/7/2015 - Harry P., Amelia B., Nicolas F., Lily Evans P.
Animagus at War by White Squirrel reviews
Sequel to The Accidental Animagus. Voldemort's back, and this time, he's not alone. Harry and his family are caught in the middle as the wizarding war goes international. Years 5-7.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 32 - Words: 202,482 - Reviews: 1112 - Favs: 3,103 - Follows: 4,570 - Updated: 12/25/2021 - Published: 8/6/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L., Neville L.
On the Way to Greatness by mira mirth reviews
As per the Hat's decision, Harry gets Sorted into Slytherin upon his arrival in Hogwarts—and suddenly, the future isn't what it used to be.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 21 - Words: 255,277 - Reviews: 4236 - Favs: 12,664 - Follows: 13,875 - Updated: 11/11/2021 - Published: 12/26/2008 - Harry P.
Far Too Many Time Travelers by Lord Jeram reviews
Someone has a daring plan to go back in time and fix everything. No wait, not him, I meant the other... how many people have time traveled anyway? Poor Harry seems to be the only normal one left.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 90,141 - Reviews: 554 - Favs: 1,679 - Follows: 2,224 - Updated: 6/17/2021 - Published: 2/9/2011 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and the Physical Adept by HaikenEdge reviews
The direct continuation of Harry Potter and the Hermetic Arts, in which cyberpunk-influenced, tabletop RPG-loving Harry Potter continues his life in and out of Hogwarts. Dark!Indie!Sarcastic!Paranoid!Pragmatic!Violent!Harry. Book 2 in Harry Potter and the RPG Influence. Rated M for language, graphic violence and sexual content. Dumbledore bashing, apparently.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 29 - Words: 129,329 - Reviews: 1146 - Favs: 2,675 - Follows: 2,911 - Updated: 4/1/2021 - Published: 12/25/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L., Norberta - Complete
Harry Potter and the Power of the Gamer by Legend of the Kyuubi reviews
Harry Potter had few pleasures growing up with the Dursleys. Books on Fantasy & Sci-Fi and video games were some of them, a secret he kept well hidden. Some time ago, he woke up and found himself able to live life like a video game. Harry couldn't make heads or tails of it but now decides to make the most it. The Gamer is coming to Hogwarts! Gamer, Witcher and D&D elements!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 89,953 - Reviews: 2126 - Favs: 6,129 - Follows: 7,916 - Updated: 4/1/2021 - Published: 6/4/2016 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., N. Tonks
Barefoot by Zaxaramas reviews
Harry has the ability to learn the history of any object he touches, whether he wants to or not.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 56 - Words: 157,477 - Reviews: 3392 - Favs: 12,251 - Follows: 14,335 - Updated: 12/22/2020 - Published: 7/7/2015 - Harry P., N. Tonks
Harry Potter and Future's Past by DriftWood1965 reviews
Starts out the day after the Battle of Hogwarts. Harry and Hermione meet the Goddess of Love, and she offers to let them go back in time. Strictly Harry and Hermione. Minor - well maybe major Ginny, Ron and Dumbledore Bashing. Soul Bond - Time Travel
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 42 - Words: 330,123 - Reviews: 8382 - Favs: 18,340 - Follows: 21,147 - Updated: 11/25/2020 - Published: 1/13/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Lighting Up the Dark by Velorien reviews
AU inspired by an omake in HPMOR. 12 years ago, the Fourth Hokage gave his life to seal Kyubey, the Nine-Brained Demon Fox, into the infant Naruto. Now, the time has come for a smarter, more creative Naruto to take on a world in which quick thinking and a solid grasp of strategy are worth a dozen rare techniques, and a brilliant mind can challenge even the deepest darkness.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 31 - Words: 183,698 - Reviews: 1206 - Favs: 2,364 - Follows: 2,744 - Updated: 10/11/2020 - Published: 5/20/2013 - Naruto U.
The Terrible Ideas Bin by The Mad Mad Reviewer reviews
Threads of writing, ideas, and beginnings I'll probably never use. Or maybe I will, if something percolates long enough.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 19 - Words: 51,879 - Reviews: 431 - Favs: 487 - Follows: 476 - Updated: 7/16/2020 - Published: 8/13/2011
Luna Lovegood and the Dark Lord's Diary by The madness in me reviews
Tom Riddle's plans fall through when Ginny Weasley loses his diary shortly after starting her first year and it is found by one Luna Lovegood. A series of bizarre conversations follow. Luna? - Yes Tom? - I've been giving this a lot of thought...and I believe you may be insane. (Not crack. Plot takes a while to appear but it's there) See last chapter for fan art and translations.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 101 - Words: 72,373 - Reviews: 4317 - Favs: 4,764 - Follows: 3,862 - Updated: 5/27/2020 - Published: 3/16/2017 - Luna L., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Supreme Champion by Haugh Wards reviews
In his dreams Harry discovered Voldemort was going to attempt to get him into the TriWizard Tournament. In retaliation he tricked the Goblet of Fire to emit the names of the people who wanted him in the tournament. Four names came out, including Albus Dumbledore. Now the new Supreme Champion is forced into the tournament. See how he fares. Dumbledore!Bashing.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 62,404 - Reviews: 690 - Favs: 4,253 - Follows: 3,439 - Updated: 4/29/2020 - Published: 6/22/2015 - [Harry P., Fleur D.] Albus D. - Complete
Itachi, Is That A Baby? by SpoonandJohn reviews
Petunia performs a bit of accidental magic. It says something about her parenting that Uchiha Itachi is considered a better prospect for raising a child. Young Hari is raised by one of the most infamous nukenin of all time and a cadre of "Uncles" whose cumulative effect is very . . . prominent. And someone had the bright idea to bring him back to England. Merlin help them all.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 102 - Words: 314,960 - Reviews: 8191 - Favs: 12,066 - Follows: 12,410 - Updated: 1/21/2020 - Published: 11/25/2015 - Harry P., Albus D., Itachi U.
Harry The HufflePuff 4 by BajaB reviews
Not going to school would have been way too much effort, and besides, Harry had promised that since last year was a bit boring, he was going to not try to avoid everything this year..
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 26,753 - Reviews: 737 - Favs: 3,496 - Follows: 3,768 - Updated: 10/14/2019 - Published: 3/10/2018 - Complete
Benefits of old laws by ulktante reviews
Parts of souls do not go on alone. When Voldemort returns to a body he is much more sane than before and realizes that he cannot go on as he started. Finding some old laws he sets out to reach his goals in another way. Harry will find his world turned upside down once more and we will see how people react when the evil is not acting how they think it should.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 109 - Words: 878,803 - Reviews: 6565 - Favs: 6,892 - Follows: 6,544 - Updated: 10/3/2019 - Published: 10/3/2015 - Harry P., Severus S., Voldemort - Complete
The Evil Overlord List by boomvroomshroom reviews
Villains always make the same dumb mistakes. Luckily, Tom Riddle happens to have a rather dangerously genre-savvy friend in his head to make sure that he does this "conquering the world" business the RIGHT way. It's about time the bad guys won for once.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 23 - Words: 106,930 - Reviews: 2507 - Favs: 7,038 - Follows: 7,434 - Updated: 8/17/2019 - Published: 1/14/2015 - Harry P., Draco M., Albus D., Tom R. Jr.
The Sun Dog by enembee reviews
I am Harry Potter and I've just destroyed everything; space, time, matter and all twenty-six dimensions of our fragile little world in the twinkling of an eye. I am Harry Potter and I have just irreparably violated Global Causality. Take that Hawking.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 5 - Words: 22,434 - Reviews: 526 - Favs: 1,690 - Follows: 2,295 - Updated: 7/2/2019 - Published: 2/12/2011 - Harry P., N. Tonks
An Honest Gringotts Visit by Vanwilder reviews
Every Gringotts visit ever. A parody one-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,629 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 15 - Published: 5/22/2019 - Harry P. - Complete
A Different Kind of Sorting by Golden Moon Huntress reviews
The Sorting Hat is in a bad mood. Pity the class of 1991. ONESHOT, AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,800 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 20 - Published: 3/8/2019 - Complete
This Tournament Needs Better Security by Right What Is Wrong reviews
Hermione realizes that some nonsense will inevitably befall Harry on Halloween 1994 and decides to soften the blow by inviting two more unwilling Champions to the Tournament: Peter Pettigrew and Tom Riddle. [Parody. Crack. Oneshot. Ron, Dumbledore, and Fudge bashing.]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,000 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 684 - Follows: 257 - Published: 1/18/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Some Loose Ends and the Computational Error by pisoprano reviews
Part 3 of The Computational Error Series. Remus Lupin is still stuck in the Well. The world he left is still going on without him. But he ought to be able to do SOMETHING about that, right?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,893 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 1/4/2019 - Published: 12/25/2017
Benefits of old laws: Out-Takes by ulktante reviews
Short scenes that do not fit into the main story. No update schedule. Will not make much sense without reading "Benefits of old laws". No particular order, I publish them as they come to me to be written.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 14,909 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 235 - Follows: 293 - Updated: 12/23/2018 - Published: 1/19/2016
Depart Azkaban by ThinkingSpeck reviews
[COMPLETE] A strict single-point-of-departure fanfic of Lesswrong's epic fanfic "Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality", diverging partway through chapter 81.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 33,484 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 205 - Updated: 9/30/2018 - Published: 8/11/2013 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Backward With Purpose Part I: Always and Always by deadwoodpecker reviews
AU. Harry, Ron, and Ginny send themselves back in time to avoid the destruction of everything they hold dear, and the deaths of everyone they love.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 286,867 - Reviews: 5037 - Favs: 8,068 - Follows: 3,183 - Updated: 9/28/2018 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Backward With Purpose Part II: The Book of Albus by deadwoodpecker reviews
This is the companion novel to Backward With Purpose. I'd read that one first. This story is complete; the sequel has begun.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 105,530 - Reviews: 1513 - Favs: 1,842 - Follows: 768 - Updated: 9/28/2018 - Published: 6/20/2008 - Albus S. P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Natural 20 by Sir Poley reviews
Milo, a genre-savvy D&D Wizard and Adventurer Extraordinaire is forced to attend Hogwarts, and soon finds himself plunged into a new adventure of magic, mad old Wizards, metagaming, misunderstandings, and munchkinry. Updates monthly.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 74 - Words: 314,214 - Reviews: 7020 - Favs: 7,458 - Follows: 8,291 - Updated: 8/2/2018 - Published: 5/7/2012
Harry Potter and the Game by Concept101 reviews
With his life turned into a Game, Harry now has to raise a Phoenix, uncover the Founders' darkest secrets, deal with political manipulations and live through Hogwarts all while trying desperately to not swear too much.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 45 - Words: 363,393 - Reviews: 7749 - Favs: 11,805 - Follows: 13,733 - Updated: 7/28/2018 - Published: 5/17/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Ginny W., Albus D.
Other People's Choices by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. The Sorting Hat doesn't just let the Sword go when it falls on Harry's head in the Chamber, but also Sorts him again, this time into Slytherin. Harry is furious and terrified, and the adults aren't helping much. COMPLETE, sequel to come.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 61 - Words: 191,253 - Reviews: 2653 - Favs: 4,380 - Follows: 4,050 - Updated: 7/23/2018 - Published: 12/12/2016 - Harry P., Severus S., Sorting Hat - Complete
The Price is Right by High Pot In Noose reviews
Point of deviation: Harry's primary school taught Home Economics. Harry's not going to let the wonders of magic take away his common sense, and if he can get a good deal, he's going to take it. Meanwhile, money is fun, but magic is funner. AU
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 52,637 - Reviews: 1394 - Favs: 7,807 - Follows: 4,861 - Updated: 7/10/2018 - Published: 12/2/2013 - Harry P., Dean T., Justin F., Morag M. - Complete
Master of Death and What it Means by charactersreadthestorysfan reviews
"Together they make the Deathly Hallows. Together they make one Master of Death." Solemn eyes meet those of his teammates."I am the Master of Death" A series of drabbles in no particular order.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 17 - Words: 21,757 - Reviews: 482 - Favs: 3,250 - Follows: 3,683 - Updated: 5/7/2018 - Published: 7/20/2013 - Harry P., Iron Man/Tony S., Thor, Black Widow/Natasha R.
A Scattered War by TheUnrealInsomniac reviews
Successful campaigns cannot be fought when its leaders have different goals. Book Two of the What A Difference A Father Makes series.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 39,773 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 982 - Follows: 1,538 - Updated: 4/5/2018 - Published: 6/9/2016 - [Harry P., Daphne G.] James P.
Harry the Hufflepuff by BajaB reviews
Luckily, lazy came up in Petunia's tirades slightly more often than freak, otherwise, this could have been a very different story. AU. Not your usual Hufflepuff!Harry story.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,190 - Reviews: 1626 - Favs: 10,223 - Follows: 3,620 - Updated: 3/12/2018 - Published: 11/10/2010 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff 3 - Harry's Year off by BajaB reviews
Sequel - Read the others first, of course. Lazy!harry is back for another year of doing nothing. This will not be a long story. Sorry for the wait.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 23,981 - Reviews: 731 - Favs: 4,038 - Follows: 1,821 - Updated: 3/10/2018 - Published: 11/23/2014 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban Abridged by KieranDell1409 reviews
Two books down, let's start number three shall we?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 22 - Words: 32,710 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/23/2018 - Published: 5/19/2017 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Albus D. - Complete
Mary Potter 3: the Chained Servant by LeighaGreene reviews
Marauders, Dementors, and a Death Eater (?) on the loose. Slytherin politics, Now with More Muggleborns! An obnoxious amount of detentions. Time turners, teenage drama, a proper dueling club, and much, much more… Welcome back to Hogwarts, where things are never boring, even when the Dark Lord's NOT possessing someone inside the school... Updates whenever I finish a chapter.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 302,113 - Reviews: 213 - Favs: 423 - Follows: 580 - Updated: 2/1/2018 - Published: 8/29/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Severus S., L. Moon
Remus Lupin and the Computational Error by pisoprano reviews
Part 2 of The Computational Error Series. In George Weasley and the Computational Error, Remus Lupin went back in time to the day of his birth, never to be heard from again. Until now. COMPLETE. SEQUEL POSTED!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,949 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 12/25/2017 - Published: 12/25/2014 - Remus L. - Complete
White Lies by Cassis Luna reviews
(COMPLETE) Draco drinks a potion that makes him know if a person is lying, and Harry, apparently at fault that Draco is this way, is forced to 'help' him with the effects of the potion. For the first time, they deal with each other with no lies to hide behind. HPDM RWHG BZNL SSRL
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 32 - Words: 182,625 - Reviews: 2337 - Favs: 6,413 - Follows: 3,211 - Updated: 12/25/2017 - Published: 6/6/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
It All Started When Harry Stole a Police Car by Lucillia reviews
Thanks to a bit of Grand Theft Automobile, Dumbledore's meddling, and some wards that were working a little too well, Little Whinging has a new Police Constable who is all of ten years old.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,769 - Reviews: 226 - Favs: 1,109 - Follows: 1,336 - Published: 6/23/2017 - Harry P., Petunia D., Dudley D., Vernon D.
Muggle Up Your Potions by Mistress of the Dungeon reviews
So her parents gave her another Muggle kitchen gadget for her birthday. Snape groaned. What in Merlin's name was a "Thermomix"?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 607 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/24/2017 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
The 101 Guide To Writing the Ultimate Fanfiction by Concept101 reviews
A satirical comedy focused around Post-5th-Year stories and tropes that surround them.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 4,692 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 1/27/2017 - Published: 1/24/2017 - Harry P. - Complete
Back Again, Harry? by Jedi Buttercup reviews
WIP. Harry makes a different choice in King's Cross and is given the double edged gift of a second chance. Time Travel AU, DH canon.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 74,412 - Reviews: 3650 - Favs: 8,609 - Follows: 11,325 - Updated: 1/12/2017 - Published: 7/31/2007 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G.
Rise of the Dark Lady Hermione (adopted) by dunuelos reviews
This is a mix of genres, first and foremost it is a 'Fix It' story. There are also hints of 'Muggles do it better', and more than a little crack, with the BDA being one of the most feared organizations on the planet, along with a bit of fun with Tom Riddle's 'You Know Who' pseudonym. Clell62619 started it. I'm adding to it. I've taken it as far as I can. Feel free to write a sequel
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 20 - Words: 49,636 - Reviews: 509 - Favs: 1,121 - Follows: 1,016 - Updated: 9/6/2016 - Published: 2/6/2016 - Hermione G., Susan B., Mr. Granger - Complete
Mary Potter 2: the Heir of Slytherin by LeighaGreene reviews
Fem!Slytherin!Harry (Mary); realistic!Professors; humanized!Dumbledore; Sequel to 'Mary Potter and the Call to Adventure'; Parallels 'Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets'. Increasingly divergent from canon, though there are still mysterious Chamber Monsters, house elves, and much illegal potions-brewing ahead for the intrepid trio... See first chapter for preface. PM for pdf.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 25 - Words: 157,613 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 429 - Follows: 263 - Updated: 8/29/2016 - Published: 10/30/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., L. Moon - Complete
Mary Potter 1: the Call to Adventure by LeighaGreene reviews
Fem!Slytherin!Harry (Mary); realistic!Dursleys; consistent!Professors; mature!Snape; follows the books VERY closely, especially the first three chapters or so (but with 50% more snark). See first chapter for preface. Most chapters K-rated, T for language, several sections from Snape's perspective are T. Later books may be M-rated. McG first contact/guardian. PM for pdf.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 141,239 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 730 - Follows: 381 - Updated: 8/29/2016 - Published: 8/9/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., L. Moon - Complete
Harry Potter: Junior Inquisitor by sprinter1988 reviews
Before the start of fifth year Dumbledore changes the plans. Unfortunately he didn't bother to inform Harry. At his trial, Harry realises that it is down to him to save his own skin. To do so his Slytherin side must come out to play, and once it's out it sticks around turning life at Hogwarts on its head. Warnings: EvilDumbles, SheepOrder/Staff, GoodGuysDontGetEverythingTheirWay
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 218,697 - Reviews: 8884 - Favs: 16,006 - Follows: 18,960 - Updated: 8/20/2016 - Published: 1/16/2013 - Harry P., Susan B., Hannah A., Amelia B.
The World of The Accidental Animagus by White Squirrel reviews
A series of one-shots in the Animagus-Verse showing the state of the magical world at the time of Voldemort's return. Some brace for war, while for others, life goes on. A bridge between The Accidental Animagus and Animagus at War.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 26,933 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 613 - Follows: 470 - Updated: 8/6/2016 - Published: 7/30/2016 - Complete
The Reluctant Champion by TheUnrealInsomniac reviews
Raised in magic by a loving family, trained by one of the best Aurors the DMLE has ever seen for a war always on the horizon and the world has a very different Boy-Who-Lived on their hands. Book One of the What A Difference A Father Makes series.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 212,337 - Reviews: 1007 - Favs: 4,176 - Follows: 3,831 - Updated: 8/5/2016 - Published: 5/18/2009 - [Harry P., Daphne G.] James P. - Complete
The Accidental Animagus by White Squirrel reviews
Harry escapes the Dursleys with a unique bout of accidental magic and eventually winds up at the Grangers' house. Now, he has what he always wanted: a loving family, and he'll need their help to take on the magical world and vanquish the dark lord who has pursued him from birth. Years 1-4. Sequel posted.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 112 - Words: 697,191 - Reviews: 5217 - Favs: 10,021 - Follows: 8,279 - Updated: 7/30/2016 - Published: 11/20/2013 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Distaff Side by Clell65619 reviews
Voldemort knows the prophecy, when he is reborn following the 3rd task of the Triwizard Tournament he takes action to ensure that Harry is no longer a threat. AU. HPLL This story will be updated slowly so that I can finish my other stories.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 73,791 - Reviews: 1936 - Favs: 4,112 - Follows: 4,934 - Updated: 6/6/2016 - Published: 11/16/2007 - Harry P., Luna L.
Magical Relations by evansentranced reviews
AU First Year onward: Harry's relatives were shocked when the Hogwarts letters came. Not because Harry got into Hogwarts. They had expected that. But Dudley, on the other hand...That had been a surprise. Currently in 5th year. *Reviews contain SPOILERS!*
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 71 - Words: 269,602 - Reviews: 6159 - Favs: 7,776 - Follows: 9,315 - Updated: 3/9/2016 - Published: 3/18/2007 - Harry P., Dudley D.
Rise of the Weasley Famiglia by jacobk reviews
Ron never wanted to be a crime boss. Pity he was so good at it. Even if he did spend most of his time worrying about what would happen when his mother found out.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,459 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 526 - Follows: 555 - Published: 2/2/2016 - Ron W.
The World of Tomorrow by Clell65619 reviews
During in the raid on the Ministry of Magic at the end of Harry's 5th year, Harry ended up in a firefight in the Time Room and vanished.
Crossover - Futurama & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,974 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 900 - Follows: 381 - Published: 2/1/2016 - Complete
Ginny Weasley and the Sealed Intelligence by BayesWatch reviews
Continuation fic of Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality. It's Ginny Weasley's first year at Hogwarts, and before she knows it, she is caught up in matters too grave even for a second year Harry James Potter-Evans-Verres.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 35 - Words: 97,916 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 182 - Follows: 299 - Updated: 12/18/2015 - Published: 3/16/2015 - Ginny W., Luna L. - Complete
Another Day in the Life of by Nemesis13 reviews
Abandoned and being Rewritten, please check my profile for the new version, thanks for your support!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 83,643 - Reviews: 415 - Favs: 754 - Follows: 887 - Updated: 11/24/2015 - Published: 9/21/2014 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Sirius B., Bellatrix L. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Planar Professor by Qfic1993 reviews
A wizard from another universe becomes the new teacher of a new subject in Hogwarts. Changing the storyline of H/P, this stranger may be more deadly than any wizard or witch in their world. DND 3.P (3.5e combined with Pathfinder) and Harry Potter. COMPLETED AS OF 8 NOVEMBER 2015!
Crossover - Harry Potter & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 86 - Words: 208,878 - Reviews: 257 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 267 - Updated: 11/8/2015 - Published: 6/13/2014 - Complete
He's Not Dead Yet by Redbayly reviews
When Harry offered himself up to Voldemort, he discovered the people in the Ministry of Death are not happy with him at all. To make up for his years of blunders, Harry is sent back in time to correct everything that went wrong and to get some revenge. Harry/6 girls, Bashing of Dumbledore, Snape, and certain Weasleys. Written for humor only. Lots of cliches. Reviews welcome.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 34 - Words: 156,481 - Reviews: 2585 - Favs: 10,463 - Follows: 7,293 - Updated: 10/30/2015 - Published: 12/27/2013 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone Abridged by KieranDell1409 reviews
Just like Little Kuriboh and Team Four Star, I'm stepping into the abridging game.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 17 - Words: 24,839 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 10/2/2015 - Published: 6/2/2015 - Complete
The Arithmancer by White Squirrel reviews
Hermione grows up as a maths whiz instead of a bookworm and tests into Arithmancy in her first year. With the help of her friends and Professor Vector, she puts her superhuman spellcrafting skills to good use in the fight against Voldemort. Years 1-4. Sequel posted.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 84 - Words: 529,133 - Reviews: 4920 - Favs: 6,930 - Follows: 4,530 - Updated: 8/22/2015 - Published: 1/31/2014 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., S. Vector - Complete
The Prisoner's Cipher by Ecthelion3 reviews
AU. Years after his defeat of Voldemort, Harry Potter remains a willing and secret prisoner of the Ministry, but not all is what it seems. Harry has a plan, and the world will never be the same.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 9 - Words: 69,457 - Reviews: 628 - Favs: 3,042 - Follows: 2,374 - Updated: 8/15/2015 - Published: 8/21/2011 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter: Master of Death and RPG's by Victor.A.Seaswitch reviews
When Harry died, he expected to be reunited with his family. What he didn't expect were the words 'Game Over', or a figure named Fate to apologise to him. Harry has the chance to restart his entire life, but all he can think is 'why do these things always happen to me'. Rated T for language, may change later on.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 28,247 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 544 - Follows: 663 - Updated: 8/11/2015 - Published: 7/17/2015 - Harry P.
Little Guy by Clell65619 reviews
What if Lilly was a little more prepared to escape if Voldemort came calling. She knew that the Floo and Portkeys could be disabled, what if she had found a back door? Just a silly little story of a somewhat different Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 21,715 - Reviews: 1133 - Favs: 3,454 - Follows: 1,681 - Updated: 7/9/2015 - Published: 4/15/2015 - Complete
Another Prisoner, Another Professor by Marauder reviews
AU. In Harry's third year he must learn the many truths about the new DADA teacher, Professor Black, and an escaped convict, Remus Lupin. Eventual SBxRL.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 67 - Words: 125,166 - Reviews: 1997 - Favs: 1,434 - Follows: 1,831 - Updated: 6/23/2015 - Published: 12/2/2004 - Sirius B., Remus L.
Harry Potter and the Something Something by Legendary Legacy reviews
Hey, wouldn't it be cool if someone took as many fanfic cliches as possible and stuffed them all into one story? No? Well, I went ahead and did it anyway. Multi-chapter Mockfic. This summary is actually a lot better than I originally thought.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,891 - Reviews: 461 - Favs: 778 - Follows: 666 - Updated: 5/4/2015 - Published: 7/18/2011 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and the Illusions of Reality by Sarcasm Dragon reviews
Harry has felt for a long time that there was something strange about the Muggle world. But when he begins receiving strange messages from the notorious mass murderer, Sirius Black, he begins to wonder if the Wizarding world is what he believed it to be. COMPLETE!
Crossover - Harry Potter & Matrix - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 30 - Words: 161,005 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 585 - Follows: 529 - Updated: 4/23/2015 - Published: 9/10/2011 - [Harry P., N. Tonks] Sirius B., Remus L. - Complete
Lily's Son by DebsTheSlytherinSnapefan reviews
Harry looks exactly like Lily when he appears at Hogwarts much to the surprise of everyone. What if Petunia told him about his world when he finally got his letter? What if they accepted him for who he was? Harry is sorted into Slytherin. He befriends Hermione (raven), Draco(Sly), Neville (Huffel) and of course Luna (Raven) later on. DISCONTINUED!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 47 - Words: 127,809 - Reviews: 3029 - Favs: 4,970 - Follows: 5,357 - Updated: 4/12/2015 - Published: 6/5/2008 - Harry P., Severus S.
A New Place To Stay by DebsTheSlytherinSnapefan reviews
Harry is called up to Dumbledore's office at the end of his fourth year and told he is to go and live with Severus Snape. Severus does what no one else bothered to do― he takes care of Harry. Watch as Harry flourishes to all that he was meant to be: A Slytherin with a heart of a lion. No slash. Will Harry be able to beat Voldemort and save the people he loves? Read and find out.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Adventure - Chapters: 79 - Words: 359,386 - Reviews: 7480 - Favs: 10,467 - Follows: 6,617 - Updated: 4/11/2015 - Published: 6/21/2011 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Harry Potter: The RPG by britael reviews
After his self-sacrifice Harry is faced with a choice, stay in limbo or play a RPG game about himself. Enough to say that stories about a character that actually chose to stay in limbo would not be a popular one... Video-game fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 87,447 - Reviews: 1009 - Favs: 2,462 - Follows: 3,059 - Updated: 3/22/2015 - Published: 7/24/2014 - Harry P.
Always Read the Fine Print by questionablequotation reviews
ONE-SHOT. After being entered into the Tri-Wizard Tournament against his will, Harry does some independent research on what precisely "magically binding" means...and comes up with a very different approach to the competition. As they say, the pen is mightier than the sword...but is the quill mightier than the wand?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,463 - Reviews: 361 - Favs: 5,128 - Follows: 1,783 - Published: 3/16/2015 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Less Wrong reviews
Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 122 - Words: 661,619 - Reviews: 36583 - Favs: 29,158 - Follows: 21,249 - Updated: 3/14/2015 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter Goes On Holiday by Steelbadger reviews
Harry Potter never did have the best luck with holidays. How do you even begin to fight a creature the size of a large building? Harry Potter vs Trespasser.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Pacific Rim - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,891 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 665 - Follows: 297 - Published: 2/11/2015 - Harry P. - Complete
Another Beginning by MaiKanon reviews
Voldemort had been faster in regaining his body, than he had been in canon, and thus, he had begun to go after Harry while the boy-who-lived was still a small child. Will a rather sane Voldemort find out, and use, the similarities there are between him and Harry to his favours, and change the wizarding world in a way no one had expected?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 16 - Words: 45,861 - Reviews: 524 - Favs: 1,188 - Follows: 1,557 - Updated: 2/9/2015 - Published: 8/21/2012 - Harry P., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr.
Recursion by erbkaiser - closed account reviews
'Those who do not learn from their mistakes are doomed to repeat them' - sometimes literally so. A Harry Potter 'Groundhog Day' story.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,219 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 809 - Follows: 296 - Published: 2/4/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., Susan B., Leanne - Complete
Seventh Horcrux by Emerald Ashes reviews
The presence of a foreign soul may have unexpected side effects on a growing child. I am Lord Volde...Harry Potter. I'm Harry Potter. In which Harry is insane, Hermione is a Dark Lady-in-training, Ginny is a minion, and Ron is confused.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 21 - Words: 104,212 - Reviews: 1889 - Favs: 10,674 - Follows: 5,040 - Updated: 2/3/2015 - Published: 9/7/2014 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Mewter by Alex Ultra reviews
Harry decides he wants to try Animagi, and persuades Hermione to help... this changes them... a lot. Crossover, of sorts, with Pokemon. Mew!Harry. Not as stupid as it sounds.
Crossover - Pokémon & Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 25 - Words: 203,953 - Reviews: 1927 - Favs: 5,395 - Follows: 4,111 - Updated: 1/28/2015 - Published: 1/29/2009 - Mew, Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Boy Who Lived by The Santi reviews
Harry Potter loves, and is loved by, his parents, his godfather, and his brother. He isn’t mistreated, abused, or neglected. So why is he a Dark Wizard? NonBWL!Harry. Not your typical Harry’s brother is the Boy Who Lived story.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 147,796 - Reviews: 4809 - Favs: 13,511 - Follows: 13,432 - Updated: 1/3/2015 - Published: 9/3/2009 - Harry P.
Inspected By No 13 by Clell65619 reviews
When he learns that flying anywhere near a Dragon is a recipe for suicide, Harry tries a last minute change of tactics, one designed to use the power of the Bureaucracy forcing him to compete against itself. Little does he know that his solution is its own kind of trap.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 18,472 - Reviews: 1616 - Favs: 10,431 - Follows: 4,118 - Updated: 8/20/2014 - Published: 6/26/2014 - Complete
The Message by erbkaiser - closed account reviews
What is Luna to do when her husband sends her a cryptic message, but to try to decipher it? Crackfic!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,800 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 36 - Published: 7/31/2014 - Luna L. - Complete
Faery Heroes by Silently Watches reviews
Response to Paladeus's challenge "Champions of Lilith". Harry, Hermione, and Luna get a chance to travel back in time and prevent the hell that England became under Voldemort's rule, and maybe line their pockets while they're at it. Lunar Harmony; plenty of innuendo, dark humor, some bashing included; manipulative!Dumbles; jerk!Snape; bad!Molly, Ron, Ginny
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 50 - Words: 245,545 - Reviews: 6740 - Favs: 14,483 - Follows: 9,420 - Updated: 7/23/2014 - Published: 6/19/2012 - [Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L.] - Complete
Let's Do The Time Warp Again! by Scorpio71 reviews
Harry (poor sod) is stuck in a time loop. It starts at the moment Voldemort hits him with the first failed Avada Kedavra as an infant and runs until the instant of his death. Then it repeats. This is the story of his second life…
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 45,803 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 155 - Updated: 7/6/2014 - Published: 9/15/2013
Family Bonds by xXDesertRoseXx reviews
When, after that fateful Halloween night, the wrong Potter twin is hailed the Boy Who Lived, how will Harry's life turn out? With a power he knows not, an ancient prophecy and one Severus Snape practically raising him, interesting at least is a given.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 76 - Words: 517,184 - Reviews: 8547 - Favs: 9,858 - Follows: 9,650 - Updated: 7/5/2014 - Published: 1/8/2012 - Harry P., Severus S.
One Misfired Spell Later by erbkaiser - closed account reviews
Harry is hit by a misfired undoing spell in third year and starts to remember things causing him to flee together with Hermione and a few others, including a godfather he didn't know he had. For Wizarding Britain and Dumbledore in particular old oaths and secrets are now brought to light. Dumbledore bashing, AU. / Story ends at the end of third year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 29 - Words: 102,838 - Reviews: 2416 - Favs: 4,118 - Follows: 4,028 - Updated: 6/16/2014 - Published: 6/19/2013 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Sirius B., Fleur D. - Complete
Harry Potter, the Geek by Andrius reviews
The summer before his fifth year, Harry obtains a computer and an internet connection. Two months later, he emerges a changed person, for what has been seen cannot be unseen. AU with the whole Harry Potter timeline moved forward to the modern day. References to internet memes, video games, anime, etc.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 23 - Words: 65,269 - Reviews: 776 - Favs: 3,386 - Follows: 1,789 - Updated: 6/7/2014 - Published: 10/30/2013 - Harry P. - Complete
Naruto: Game of the Year Edition by Majin Hentai X reviews
On Hiatus due to Real Life and I'm sorry so deeply sorry for the broken promise
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Parody - Chapters: 22 - Words: 208,515 - Reviews: 2788 - Favs: 5,543 - Follows: 5,508 - Updated: 6/3/2014 - Published: 1/27/2009 - Naruto U.
And Now For Some Crazy by loverofeevee reviews
Just some Harry Potter went back in time silliness. I've missed out plenty so no busting my butt over it! There's a bit of sexual innuendo and some swearing, nothing big.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,124 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 3/23/2014 - Published: 11/5/2013 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Cauldron of Shipping by Thalwen The Stabby reviews
It's Harry's third year, a mass-murderer on the loose and a new, powerful magical artefact that Voldemort would totally love getting his hands on (but first he needs hands). Also lots of killer rabbits.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,213 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 1/17/2014 - Published: 12/17/2013 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Harry Potter: The Last Avatar by The Sorting Cat reviews
Why is Harry Potter considered the worst firebender in Gryffindor? Why doesn't he want to be noticed? Probably the same reason he dreams of drowning every night. [Harry Potter characters in an AU with magic replaced by the elemental powers of Avatar: The Last Airbender / Legend of Korra. Full summary inside.]
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 15 - Words: 135,342 - Reviews: 1322 - Favs: 3,319 - Follows: 3,636 - Updated: 1/7/2014 - Published: 10/16/2012 - Harry P.
Harry Potter: Game of the Year Edition by Flux Casey reviews
Harry Potter dies in the graveyard of Little Hangleton. GAME OVER. Start new game? Concept borrowed from Majin Hentai X and Chibi-Reaper. ABANDONED
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 37,205 - Reviews: 1524 - Favs: 4,291 - Follows: 5,276 - Updated: 12/24/2013 - Published: 4/23/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Seriously Evil Plot by Thalwen The Stabby reviews
It's Harry Potter's sixth year at Hogwarts and Voldemort needs a new plan.. a good plan.. a seriously evil plan, and he thinks he he finally has one. Now complete. Mild violence, some rather (im)mature content.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,771 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/5/2013 - Published: 12/4/2013 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Death's Pride by Paladeus reviews
Harry dies, again, and his Death Angel is NOT happy. Sent back for the last time with his memories intact, he tries to do it right. And his Death Angel won't leave him or his soul mates alone. Challenge by Reptilia28; H/Hr/L Nev/Sus B/Han A
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 28 - Words: 630,526 - Reviews: 3647 - Favs: 7,453 - Follows: 7,795 - Updated: 11/27/2013 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L.
A Parody of Sirius' Will Reading by Diresquirrel reviews
I've read one too many stories with long drawn out will readings where Sirius leaves Harry more money than the UK's GDP. In response I came up with this abomination.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,326 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 502 - Follows: 163 - Published: 10/30/2013 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Temporal Beacon by willyolioleo reviews
At the end of 3rd year, Hermione asks Harry for some help with starting an interesting project. If a dark lord's got a 50-year head start on you, maybe what you need is a little more time to even the playing field. AU, Timetravel, HHr, mild Ron bashing. Minimizing new powers, just making good use of existing ones.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 70 - Words: 428,826 - Reviews: 5733 - Favs: 6,886 - Follows: 7,359 - Updated: 9/19/2013 - Published: 11/30/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Harry Potter and the Methods of Chaos by JBean210 reviews
A sequel to Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality. Harry James Potter-Evans-Verres owns a global corporation that is poised and ready for the Singularity, or so it seems, until a journalist appears wanting to question Harry's motivations.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 32 - Words: 243,520 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 259 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 7/26/2013 - Published: 10/14/2011 - Harry P., OC - Complete
Seeing Death Eaters by erbkaiser - closed account reviews
Harry is transported to a graveyard following the Third Task of the Tournament, and finds a creative solution to survive the fight with Voldemort and his minions.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Monty Python - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 968 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 747 - Follows: 217 - Published: 6/18/2013 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
The Warlock of Slytherin by Romantic Silence reviews
After his mother died, his father abandoned him with his relatives. Harry grew up emulating his uncle, a shrewd businessman. With his best friend and neighbor, Hermione, by his side, he has big plans to be at the top! However, his plans get derailed when it's revealed that not only is he a wizard, but his father is one too and that his twin brother is the famous Boy Who Lived!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 12 - Words: 76,944 - Reviews: 1702 - Favs: 5,290 - Follows: 6,217 - Updated: 3/5/2013 - Published: 11/10/2011 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Reunion by Rorschach's Blot reviews
It all starts with Hogwarts' Class Reunion.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 61,134 - Reviews: 1999 - Favs: 7,257 - Follows: 4,490 - Updated: 3/2/2013 - Published: 11/14/2008 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Unlocked Knowledge by kmfrank reviews
When Harry returns home to Privet Drive after the fiasco at the Department of Mysteries, he finds that Voldemort's possession released the Horcrux inside of him. In addition to the companionship of "Tom", Harry has his knowledge, and must learn to use it
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 168,125 - Reviews: 1402 - Favs: 4,404 - Follows: 4,819 - Updated: 2/20/2013 - Published: 1/10/2008
Hiding in Plain Sight by Clell65619 reviews
The summer prior to 6th year Harry deals with Tom in a decisive, if accidental manner. That summer Harry gets a girl friend in Susan Bones, and sets about some self improvement. It is after this change to himself he discovers something a bit disturbing about the Wizarding World, something that Hermione Granger is determined to use to her advantage.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,665 - Reviews: 628 - Favs: 5,281 - Follows: 1,639 - Published: 1/23/2013 - Harry P., Susan B. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Seer of Time by Akirina reviews
Adopted: Alt Universe - Harry Potter is a very strange child. He KNOWS things. Things he shouldn't know. What if Harry was born with a powerful seer's sight? Intelligent, driven, independent, parselmagic, parselmouth. A do-over sort of story, but not.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 21 - Words: 88,491 - Reviews: 231 - Favs: 1,877 - Follows: 1,855 - Updated: 12/24/2012 - Published: 4/24/2012 - Harry P.
Sapphire Eleanor Rose Suzette de Mont vs Canon by susieboo reviews
Second entry in the MSEA Files. The sequel to "Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way vs Canon." There's a new Sue in town; Sapphire, an annoyingly smart, annoyingly pure, annoyingly modest, annoyingly pretty, annoyingly sweet, annoyingly desirable girl. You can panic now.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 19 - Words: 17,780 - Reviews: 220 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 12/9/2012 - Published: 1/21/2012 - OC - Complete
Harry Potter and the Eyes of the Serpent by MariusDarkwolf reviews
My Take on Proud Mudbloods Challenge: Harry's in the Hospital Wing with Hermione is revived instead of the Great Hall. Full description inside. Dom!Harry Sub!Hermione
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 114,457 - Reviews: 2044 - Favs: 4,831 - Follows: 5,089 - Updated: 10/3/2012 - Published: 4/15/2011 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Brian's Bits by Brian64 reviews
A collection of drabbles and shorts that don't have their own story... at least not yet. You can expect to see Harry as the main character, and you won't find any m/m slash inside, or anything explicit.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,624 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 6/19/2012 - Published: 9/5/2009 - Harry P.
Jamie Evans and Fate's Fool by The Mad Mad Reviewer reviews
Harry Potter stepped back in time with enough plans to deal with just about everything fate could throw at him. He forgot one problem: He's fate's chewtoy. Mentions of rape, sex, unholy vengeance, and venomous squirrels. Reposted after takedown!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 12 - Words: 77,208 - Reviews: 553 - Favs: 4,542 - Follows: 1,852 - Published: 6/2/2012 - [Harry P., N. Tonks] - Complete
Harry Potter and the Sun Source by Clell65619 reviews
This is an extremely AU crossover fic that asks the question what might have happened if Petunia Dursley hadn't found a young Harry Potter sleeping on her doorstep on the morning of the 2nd of November 1981. After all, Dumbledore was a bit careless with
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 111,868 - Reviews: 2553 - Favs: 9,900 - Follows: 5,795 - Updated: 5/3/2012 - Published: 9/11/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
A Darker Shade of Light Part II by st122 reviews
The world stands poised as Harry and Ginny return from their journey. Yet, things are different despite all that he thought he knew. How will he come to terms with who he is as his world is turned upside down?
Crossover - Harry Potter & Wheel of Time - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 98,049 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 4/30/2012 - Published: 4/26/2011 - Harry P.
Thoughts of Pudding 2012 by Brian64 reviews
*2012 REVISION* Chaos theory: a nargle flaps its wings in China, and Luna responds differently to Harry during their conversation before the leaving feast in OoTP. Harry/Luna/Hermione. No nargles were harmed during the writing of this fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 141,257 - Reviews: 481 - Favs: 1,501 - Follows: 1,963 - Updated: 3/25/2012 - Published: 2/5/2012 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L.
Things not to do In Tar Valon by West-Wanderer reviews
The are some things it is wiser not to do in the White Tower, as some Aes Sedi are about to learn - the hard way...
Wheel of Time - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,548 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/6/2012 - Published: 12/11/2011 - Complete
Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way vs Canon by susieboo reviews
First entry in the MSEA Files. There's a new student at Hogwarts by the name of Ebony Way, and she seems pretty screwed up in the head. Rated T for language and canon rape. And eye rape, probably.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 16 - Words: 13,095 - Reviews: 258 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 12/22/2011 - Published: 9/3/2011 - OC - Complete
Lessons With Hagrid by NothingPretentious reviews
"Have you found out how to get past that beast of Hagrid's yet?" ...Snape kicks Harry out of 'Remedial Potions', but as we know from The Philosopher's Stone, there is another Occlumens in the school good enough to keep out the Dark Lord. Stupid oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,357 - Reviews: 705 - Favs: 4,875 - Follows: 1,092 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Rubeus H. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff 2 by BajaB reviews
Lazy!Harry is back, and not doing very much at all...
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 23,642 - Reviews: 1033 - Favs: 5,587 - Follows: 2,144 - Updated: 10/5/2011 - Published: 8/28/2011 - Complete
Multiverse by Bobmin356 reviews
Godlike Harry? Super Luna? Nested Infinities and mind bending quantum mechanics. Mutant Pandas and Smiling Horcruxes, what else can you ask for? Its cracked!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 4 - Words: 63,426 - Reviews: 344 - Favs: 2,049 - Follows: 850 - Updated: 9/20/2011 - Published: 9/17/2011 - Harry P., Luna L. - Complete
Saying No by Bobmin356 reviews
Post OOTP, Harry is fed up and won't take it anymore. Dumbledore's worst nightmare!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 122,301 - Reviews: 1927 - Favs: 7,543 - Follows: 2,828 - Updated: 8/18/2011 - Published: 8/10/2011 - Harry P. - Complete
Time Warp by Kittenn1011 reviews
Harry Potter wakes up one morning in the body of his ten-year-old self. This time around, he declares, no way anyone's going to die! -And it's gonna be totally awesome- "People shouldn't meddle with time, Potter." Little did they know...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 37 - Words: 116,434 - Reviews: 1084 - Favs: 2,355 - Follows: 2,769 - Updated: 6/28/2011 - Published: 9/23/2009 - Harry P., Draco M.
Harry Potter and it's a Hufflepuff Omniverse by Clell65619 reviews
Harry is sent to a alternate reality by a petulant Tom Riddle, and the Hufflepuff Collective isn't happy about it at all.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,175 - Reviews: 195 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 495 - Updated: 5/5/2011 - Published: 11/24/2007 - Harry P.
Jokes! by Pippa Spark reviews
JOKES! My favourite jokes that I have adapted to various novels by Tamora Pierce. Alanna, Jon, George, Raoul, Daine, Kel, Rosethorn, Sandry, Tris, Briar, Daja... jokes for all! OVER 25,000 HITS! A variety of jokes, a fun read, please R/R!
Song of the Lioness - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 6,809 - Reviews: 274 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 2/7/2011 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Circle of Magic, Tortall
His Own Man by Crunchysunrises reviews
In the station between Life and Death Harry makes a different choice. Now he is eleven again, nothing is going the same as before, and people are starting to ask questions, especially the Malfoys, the Hogwarts professors and, most worryingly, Mad-Eye Moody. Harry is beginning to suspect that he might not be up to this Master of Death business and everything that goes along with it.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 31 - Words: 147,481 - Reviews: 5897 - Favs: 15,917 - Follows: 17,310 - Updated: 1/2/2011 - Published: 10/19/2009 - Harry P.
A Darker Shade of Light Part I by st122 reviews
After a rough start to the year, what will happen when Harry dissapears? Prophecies, gateways, powers unknown and the ages of time combine to change Harry's life and the way he sees the world.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Wheel of Time - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 125,214 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 201 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 12/27/2010 - Published: 7/13/2010 - Harry P. - Complete
Lord of Caer Azkaban by Rorschach's Blot reviews
A letter causes Harry to learn some surprising things about his lineage, a different twist on the usual Harry in Azkaban story line.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 34 - Words: 119,393 - Reviews: 5686 - Favs: 13,479 - Follows: 6,645 - Updated: 12/14/2010 - Published: 10/24/2004 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Champion's Champion by DriftWood1965 reviews
Harry allows Ron to compete for him in the tournament. How does he fare? This is a Harry/Hermione story with SERIOUSLY Idiot!Ron Bashing. If that isn't what you like, please read something else. Complete but I do expect to add an alternate ending or two.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 109,138 - Reviews: 4608 - Favs: 13,357 - Follows: 5,449 - Updated: 11/26/2010 - Published: 11/1/2009 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Of Harry and Harry by joe6991 reviews
What does it take to end a war? For Harry Potter, the last throw of the dice would count for all. Bargains have been struck and the road to Hell has been paved with the regret of the guilty. A war may end, but a new one will begin...
Crossover - Harry Potter & Dresden Files - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,549 - Reviews: 187 - Favs: 498 - Follows: 598 - Updated: 8/24/2010 - Published: 12/11/2009 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and the Wastelands of Time by joe6991 reviews
Take a deep breath, count back from ten… and above all else – don't worry! It'll all be over soon. The world, that is. Yet for Harry Potter the end is just the beginning. Enemies close in on all sides, and Harry faces his greatest challenge of all - Time.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 31 - Words: 282,609 - Reviews: 3295 - Favs: 6,458 - Follows: 3,642 - Updated: 8/4/2010 - Published: 2/12/2008 - Harry P., Fleur D. - Complete
The Thief of Hogwarts by bluminous8 reviews
Summary: AU Young Harry learns to steal as he is fed up from his deprivation of his wants and needs by his guardians. A Thief is born in Privet Drive.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 105,046 - Reviews: 4159 - Favs: 12,085 - Follows: 11,051 - Updated: 6/22/2010 - Published: 7/7/2009 - Harry P.
He's Not Normal by Uncle Stojil reviews
Harry Potter goes back in time and has to start everything again. Do you think he will be careful not to screw the timeline up? No, he doesn’t even think about it! A story featuring a loony Harry and a Magical World that seems willing to adapt to him.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 51,722 - Reviews: 851 - Favs: 3,952 - Follows: 4,139 - Updated: 5/24/2010 - Published: 6/5/2008 - Harry P.
Dolores’ Angels by Sarah1281 reviews
After Umbridge invades the DA and brings Harry to the Headmaster's office to be punished, he finds that the name at the top of the incriminating parchment wasn't 'Dumbledore' Army' but 'Dolores' Angels.' Only one thing to do then: Impersonate a fan club.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,373 - Reviews: 403 - Favs: 2,420 - Follows: 584 - Published: 4/20/2010 - Harry P., Dolores U. - Complete
Harry Potter and Afterlife Inc by dunuelos reviews
My own response to Reptilia28's challenge. Harry died in the battle with Voldemort. What happens when he meets the Grim Reaper? Especially when the Reaper isn't happy with him. Rating changed to more appropriate one. HHr. Other pairings as they come.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 110,380 - Reviews: 1976 - Favs: 7,970 - Follows: 2,803 - Updated: 2/25/2010 - Published: 1/25/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Run that by me again? by Sarah1281 reviews
Ever wonder 'Why don't they just do that' "A lot of the greatest wizards haven't got an ounce of logic." Harry and Hermione, however, were raised in the muggle world and are therefore fully capable of thinking things through...A collection of of one-shots
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 21 - Words: 53,842 - Reviews: 2117 - Favs: 4,240 - Follows: 2,882 - Updated: 12/30/2009 - Published: 6/24/2008 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Time, Mr Potter? by Tw15teD reviews
Five years after Voldemort's victory over the Order of the Phoenix, Harry Potter is a man on the run. But what happens when he is thrown into his twelve-year old body in a freak accident? Non-DH compliant. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Horror - Chapters: 35 - Words: 195,226 - Reviews: 1299 - Favs: 2,894 - Follows: 1,756 - Updated: 12/28/2009 - Published: 3/30/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Inquisition by The Hallows reviews
After saving the life of an Inquisitor at the age of four, Harry is taken in by the Inquisition and trained to hunt down Dark Wizards. When his next assignment leads him to teach at Hogwarts, it begins a series of events that will change his life forever.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 77,310 - Reviews: 208 - Favs: 402 - Follows: 404 - Updated: 12/24/2009 - Published: 9/17/2009 - Harry P.
Oh God Not Again! by Sarah1281 reviews
So maybe everything didn't work out perfectly for Harry. Still, most of his friends survived, he'd gotten married, and was about to become a father. If only he'd have stayed away from the Veil, he wouldn't have had to go back and do everything AGAIN.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 50 - Words: 162,639 - Reviews: 16099 - Favs: 27,301 - Follows: 11,483 - Updated: 12/22/2009 - Published: 9/13/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
The Desk by opalish reviews
Crack oneshot. Malcolm Baddock fails at office warfare, and Harry teaches his desk to speak.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,468 - Reviews: 251 - Favs: 1,586 - Follows: 269 - Published: 9/23/2009 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Unforgiven by Jayiin Mistaya reviews
Year six AU. HG, RHr. Harry and Ginny must deal with unforseen consequences of the Chamber of Secrets while Fudge plots to control the Boy Who Lived and Voldemort awakes forbidden, forgotten Lore to wage his war on the wizarding world.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 183,860 - Reviews: 583 - Favs: 484 - Follows: 659 - Updated: 8/31/2009 - Published: 10/29/2006 - Harry P., Ginny W.
101 Ways to Kill Umbridge by Espoir Noir reviews
Sick to death of his DADA professor, Ron decided to compile this list.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 7,657 - Reviews: 375 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 332 - Updated: 7/27/2009 - Published: 12/3/2007 - Ron W., Dolores U.
The Life of Brian: A Super Harry Parody by Perspicacity reviews
At the end of Harry's long life, he and Ginny say their final goodbyes. Her ghost fades into memory, her purpose accomplished, as Harry draws his final breath and prepares to meet her in the afterlife. Then something unexpected happens.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,074 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 281 - Follows: 74 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Curse of Fate by Mistress Nika reviews
Immortal Harry, after watching friends and family die over thousands of years, only wants to join his loved ones in death. Believing he's found a way, he sends himself back into the body of his infant self, vowing to change his fate. Dark Lord Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 168,398 - Reviews: 3653 - Favs: 7,921 - Follows: 7,113 - Updated: 3/10/2009 - Published: 12/15/2005 - [Harry P., Lucius M.]
The Substitute by BajaB reviews
The magical contract made by the Goblet of Fire inadvertently sets underway events that change everything you thought you knew about the boy-who-lived. AU GOF, depressing and a bit dark.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 35,945 - Reviews: 858 - Favs: 2,624 - Follows: 1,113 - Updated: 12/16/2008 - Published: 11/7/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Like Bubbles in a Bathtub by Agnostics Puppet reviews
Harry, bored one night and hyped by his favorite TV show, decided to cast a new spell he just found. You'd think he'd read the directions first. Dimension hopping, not quite badass Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 20,733 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 341 - Follows: 528 - Updated: 10/8/2008 - Published: 9/2/2008 - Harry P.
The Wendell That Wasn't by opalish reviews
The true story of how Harry and Ginny's kids got their names. Really, it's all Snape's fault. Crackfic oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,814 - Reviews: 565 - Favs: 3,526 - Follows: 510 - Published: 7/15/2008 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
The Poker Game by Enterprise1701-d reviews
Draco organizes a no-holds-barred poker game. Harry decides to compete... just a little fun fic co-written by Joshua. I might or might not write more on this.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 123,923 - Reviews: 719 - Favs: 4,502 - Follows: 2,093 - Updated: 7/6/2008 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and The Acts of Betrayal by Clell65619 reviews
The Semiclassic 'everyone has been lying to Harry about everything' plot. Very AU. Bashing of pretty much everyone. Mind Control Sex. Language. Dumbledore decides the Old Families won't tolerate the Chosen One being with a mudblood. Sucks to be Ron Ginny
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 77,977 - Reviews: 2103 - Favs: 6,100 - Follows: 2,509 - Updated: 5/7/2008 - Published: 9/28/2007 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Dagger and Rose by Perspicacity reviews
Dumbledore doesn’t ignore the 2nd prophecy! He apprentices Harry and teaches him a rare form of magic, but draws the ire of a secret society who seek to guard this knowledge and do Harry in. Assassination attempts on multiple fronts. H/F, Yr. 4 GoF AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 85,199 - Reviews: 1445 - Favs: 3,073 - Follows: 1,604 - Updated: 5/7/2008 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Harry P., Fleur D. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Marauders’ Horcrux by The Santi reviews
On the eve of their graduation from Hogwarts, a drunk James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew took drastic steps to protect the tradition of pranking at Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,964 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 439 - Follows: 213 - Published: 4/26/2008 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
A Black Comedy by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. Two years after defeating Voldemort, Harry falls into an alternate dimension with his godfather. Together, they embark on a new life filled with drunken debauchery, thievery, and generally antagonizing all their old family, friends, and enemies.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 31 - Words: 246,320 - Reviews: 6658 - Favs: 19,204 - Follows: 7,067 - Updated: 4/7/2008 - Published: 2/18/2007 - Complete
Larceny, Lechery, and Luna Lovegood! by Rorschach's Blot reviews
It takes two thieves, a Dark Wizard, and a Tentacle Monster named Tim.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 83 - Words: 230,739 - Reviews: 2841 - Favs: 5,087 - Follows: 2,315 - Updated: 4/4/2008 - Published: 7/31/2007 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Once Upon a Freakin' Time by Evadne reviews
The Death Eaters attempt to do bad things, but mostly just do things badly.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 40 - Words: 29,923 - Reviews: 2008 - Favs: 2,240 - Follows: 812 - Updated: 2/15/2008 - Published: 8/7/2002 - Voldemort, Severus S.
So You've Decided to Be Evil by Evadne reviews
Harry Potter discovers there are things far, far more annoying than Death.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,600 - Reviews: 514 - Favs: 1,788 - Follows: 1,277 - Updated: 12/1/2007 - Published: 3/3/2006 - Voldemort, Harry P.
A Sarcastic Git's Golden Rules at Hogwarts by Twisted Biscuit reviews
Hogwarts has a Sarcastic Little Git inside it’s walls. That Sarcastic Little Git is deeply disgruntled. In an effort to strike out against those who annoy him [read:everybody], he is posting mocking and vaguely offensive “Guidelines” on the notice boards.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 39,607 - Reviews: 396 - Favs: 703 - Follows: 301 - Updated: 10/30/2007 - Published: 3/9/2006 - Theodore N.
Harry Potter and The Trademark Dispute by Clell65619 reviews
Voldemort has finally pushed Harry too far. There is only one recourse open to the young hero. He must unleash the most horrifying, the most diabolical weapon in his arsenal. The mind of Hermione Granger.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 16 - Words: 17,434 - Reviews: 571 - Favs: 2,285 - Follows: 811 - Updated: 10/20/2007 - Published: 10/2/2007 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter and The Dark Lord Prevention Tech by Clell65619 reviews
One Shot Luna has a plan, and the technology to back it up.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,605 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 1,090 - Follows: 306 - Published: 9/29/2007 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Fugitives of Azkaban by BajaB reviews
A 'Harry goes to Azkaban' story. Convicted for releasing the Basilisk from the Chamber of Secrets, Harry is put into a cell next to the most feared wizard in the world, Sirius Black. AU 3rd year, canon pairings, no Deathly Hallows.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 65,347 - Reviews: 1220 - Favs: 4,104 - Follows: 1,812 - Updated: 9/11/2007 - Published: 6/15/2007 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
The Mary Sues Cometh by citygirl1116 reviews
A lesser known Hogwarts class teaches new students what they really need to survive at school. A citygirl1116® parody!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 9,047 - Reviews: 637 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 243 - Updated: 6/17/2007 - Published: 7/28/2005 - Harry P.
The Hunt For Harry Potter by Rorschach's Blot reviews
A Sequel to Make a Wish: Takes place directly after the events of 'Make a Wish,' Harry Potter is missing and his friends are determined to find him.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 51,144 - Reviews: 1741 - Favs: 5,984 - Follows: 2,775 - Updated: 3/22/2007 - Published: 7/7/2006 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and The Power of Love by Rorschach's Blot reviews
Oneshot: Hermione convinces Harry to join her 'Domestic Skills' Club and someone tampers with the food.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,397 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 1,269 - Follows: 492 - Published: 3/1/2007 - Complete
The Memory Chest by BajaB reviews
[Completed] An Alternate Universe seventh year story picking up immediately after HBP. Dumbledore leaves Harry an interesting legacy. A bit of humour, some action, even a bit of angst and romance. Includes my guesses for DH some were close!.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 37 - Words: 160,053 - Reviews: 461 - Favs: 575 - Follows: 241 - Updated: 2/2/2007 - Published: 12/1/2006 - Harry P. - Complete
So Sue Me by lunakatrina reviews
My take on Harry's first year starting with him getting his letters. Add a lot of sarcasm, stir, and serve cold.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 44,383 - Reviews: 2446 - Favs: 4,941 - Follows: 4,138 - Updated: 1/5/2007 - Published: 6/23/2006 - Harry P.
The Quidditch Team, the Peeping Tom and the by cheryl bites reviews
Dumbledore decrees that the members of each of the Hogwarts Quidditch teams must share a bed in order to improve their teamwork. It works, in manner of speaking. Slash, femslash, het.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,762 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 71 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Harry P., George W. - Complete
Helpful Hints for First Years by BajaB reviews
What things should First year students at Hogwarts know? A two chapter list fic of warnings and information vital to happiness and success at Hogwarts, or maybe not.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,244 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 10/2/2006 - Published: 9/25/2006 - Complete
The Man Of Mystery by cheryl bites reviews
Professor McGonagall wants Harry to find the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. Written for the Spam Sender challenge at Perposterice.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 564 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/8/2006 - Minerva M., Harry P. - Complete
A Better Man by Valandar reviews
Vernon changed in the beginning to be a better man, thanks to a wish. How will this affect Harry, and the entire Wizarding World? Now complete! Please R&R. AU, HPGW, RWHG, RLNT
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 54 - Words: 192,896 - Reviews: 1862 - Favs: 3,140 - Follows: 1,192 - Updated: 9/5/2006 - Published: 8/12/2005 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
Make A Wish by Rorschach's Blot reviews
Harry has learned the prophesy and he does not believe that a schoolboy can defeat Voldemort, so he decides that if he is going to die then he is first going to live.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 187,589 - Reviews: 11837 - Favs: 23,958 - Follows: 8,615 - Updated: 6/17/2006 - Published: 3/23/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Innate Malapropism by Lord Jeram reviews
Harry Potter's new adventure into awkward indoctrination. HPPHHPYRRYPH. Abandoned (It was an early attempt to HP humor but I ran out of ideas after the second chapter)
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,782 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 15 - Published: 5/7/2006 - Harry P.
Lets do the Time Warp Again by Rorschach's Blot reviews
A potions accident throws Harry back in time into his younger self's body, he decides to go nuts and do everything he's ever wanted to do . . . and get revenge on everyone.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 36,402 - Reviews: 2355 - Favs: 6,810 - Follows: 2,707 - Updated: 5/3/2006 - Published: 2/4/2006 - Harry P. - Complete
The Educational Decrees: Like Umbridge by Smirnoff Ryuu reviews
only funny! A parody on the decrees written by Dolores J Umbridge
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 17 - Words: 2,210 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 2/6/2006 - Published: 9/3/2005
When Dark Lords Chat by Mistress of the Dungeon reviews
Chapter 4 is up. What happens when a few really bad guys meet for regular online chats? Just a silly little Harry Potter, StarWars, Lord of the Rings crossover. Was originally meant to be a oneshot but the plot what plot? bunny kept nagging me.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,790 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 1/27/2006 - Published: 1/13/2006 - Voldemort, Harry P.
Birth of a Name by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. OneShot. 1943. A Slytherin prefect on the brink of a series of lifechanging events, needs to settle on a secret identity that will inspire fear in the hearts of the weak... You didn’t think 'I am Lord Voldemort' was his first choice, did you?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,535 - Reviews: 550 - Favs: 2,137 - Follows: 397 - Published: 10/15/2005 - Complete
There's Always a Way by S'TarKan reviews
This is my response to the Marriage Law challenge after hearing about it and reading some stories... and thinking about what MY reaction would have been if I was Harry. Oneshot, complete with epilogue.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,064 - Reviews: 386 - Favs: 1,626 - Follows: 404 - Published: 10/10/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
Where in the World is Harry Potter? by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. PostOotP. Harry Potter fulfilled the prophecy and has since disappeared. Or has he? Tonks and Hermione are the lead Order members continuously hoping to track him down. The question is: can they keep up with him?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 54,625 - Reviews: 1187 - Favs: 5,129 - Follows: 1,635 - Updated: 4/30/2005 - Published: 4/16/2005 - Complete
H is for Helga by Draegyn reviews
Professor Potter's first history lesson: the books are wrong and Hermione is going to be remembered as the dumbest best friend in history.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,399 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 1,167 - Follows: 249 - Published: 5/7/2004 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Harry Potter is on FIRE! by Darkboy77 reviews
WARNING:Insane story inside. Do not bump, shake, ingest, throw, or expose to crazy and ridiculous amounts of radiation. ((((((IT... IS... FINISHED!)))))) THE LAST CHAPTER: Voldemort's power is in his... wait, this can't be right... HIS POWER'S IN HIS-
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 59,771 - Reviews: 555 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 4/25/2004 - Published: 2/11/2004 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and Some Sorcerer's Rock by Silvver Phoenix reviews
A short spoof of the first Harry Potter book that I had to write for English class. Note: I'm insane, as is my writing. You've been warned.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,308 - Reviews: 402 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 37 - Published: 2/24/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Truth about Time
Time travel is complicated. I found out just how much so.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 108 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/17/2020
Drabbles 'n bits One Shot collection reviews
A collection of drabbles. Rated M for Suggestive themes.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 285 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/3/2018 - [Harry P., Luna L.] Voldemort - Complete
Wheel of the DM
Long ago, in a time yet to come, two worlds collide. Two bands, as alike as brothers, yet as different as possible. One threat with two faces. Updates whenever.
Crossover - Wheel of Time & Dungeons and Dragons - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 268 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/23/2017 - [Rand A., Aviendha, Min F., Elayne T.]