Previously EirinnOfMyth, I had to change my username due to personal reasons.

I will have all of my story-related information at the bottom of the page if you want to scroll down to that.

Most of my stories will be rated "T", just to be safe. I will accept constructive criticism and positive comments, but please don't say anything mean, it just puts me down, and then I won't write for a month, and then no more stories. Just a heads up, I don't own DC comics, Percy Jackson, the Batfam or young justice, I'm not that old, or smart, or extensively creative. I'm new at this so, please, no hate. Remember, I am a girl, I am still in school! I have schoolwork and swim team, I can't update everyday, but I'll try every week.

#ItsOkayToBeGay!

You are who you are, gay, bi, straight, pan, ect. and that's okay. No one has the right to hate or discriminate against you because of your sexuality.

This is from DixieGrayson's profile, thanks! (I took this and modified it a bit, so this is inspired from DixieGrayson's profile.)

If you make fun of sugar

You make fun of candy

If you make fun of candy

You make fun of cotton candy

If you make fun of cotton candy

You make fun of carnvials

If you make fun of carnivals

You make fun of circuses

If you make fun of circuses

You make fun of the Flying Graysons

If you make fun of the Flying Graysons

You make fun of Dick Grayson

If you make fun of Dick Grayson

You make fun of... Richard Grayson

If you make fun of Richard Grayson

You make fun of Robin

If you make fun of Robin

You make fun of Nightwing

If you make fun of Nightwing

You make fun of Batman

If you make fun of Batman

You make fun of Gotham

If you make fun of Gotham

You make fun of Gotham's villains

If you make fun of Gotham's villains

You make fun of Gotham's rouges

If you mame fun of Gotham's rouges

You make fun of the Joker

This is from anonymouswriter17's profile, enjoy

95 percent of teenage girls are obsessed with Miley Cyrus and Demi Lovato, if your part of the 5 percent that isn't Copy and Paste this onto your profile!

90 of teens would have a nervous breakdown if the Jones brothers were at the top of the empire state building, ready to jump. If you're the 10 that would be sitting in a lawn chair across the street eating popcorn while yelling 'jump!' post this on you're profile.

90 of teens today would die if MySpace/Facebook/Twitter had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your Profile.

80 percent of people don't know what the hell FanFiction is and won't care if it had a system failure. If you are the 20 percent who would die, freak out, have a nervous breakdown, or take it out on the furniture, copy and paste this to your Profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off at the morons who actually believe that.

90% of teen girls would cry if they saw Robert Patterson (Edward Cullen from Twilight) standing on top of a sky scraper, about to jump. 5% would sit there eating pop corn screaming "FLY VAMPIRE BOY, FLY!" If you're the other 5% who would run up and push the douche bag off the ledge already for besmirching the name of the awesome bloodsucking vampires then copy and paste this to your profile

98% of teenage girls would die if Justin Bieber jumped off a building, 1% would be eating pop corn wearing 3D glasses screaming "hurry up already!", repost if you're the 1% that "convinced" him to jump off in the first place

If Justin Bieber went missing, 97% of people would search 2% would cry and if you are the 1% poking your new prisoner with a sharp stick then copy and paste this into your profile.

95 percent of all teens would go into a panic if the Jonas brothers were on a 100 foot building about to jump. copy and paste this if you are one of the 5 who brought popcorn and invited friends.

95 percent of the teenage population would go into panic if Miley Cyrus was standing off a ledge of a 10 story building. Put this on your profile if you would be the 5 percent standing there with a megaphone screaming do a front flip

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself. So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

This is from rainbowunicorns494's profile, thanks!

You do so many things you don't understand.

The boy you called lame. He has to work every night to support his family.

That girl you pushed down the other day.She's already being abused at home.

That girl you called fat. She's starving herself.

The old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars. He fought for our country.

That little boy that you call small and ugly? He has a 5% chance of living because he was a premature baby. (6 months).

That boy doing his homework in homeroom? Last night he talked his friend out of suicide.

That young boy you just made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow because his family is too poor.

The boy you made fun of for crying. His mother is dying.

If you're against bullies, copy and paste this into your profile! Have a heart!

I was whelmed until I got traught and crashed the mode, now I'm feeling the aster and you can be as chalant as you like with me because i'm turbed; noted, I'm in renial.

It's a Young Justice thing.

How most conversations with me go:

"There are 1000 ways I could kill you, and 941 of them hurt."

"So what do the other 59 of them do? Tickle?"

Sanity? Why would I want something as useless as that?

I'm not suffering from insanity...I'm enjoying every minute of it!

We are not retreating...we are advancing in another direction.

Whoever said "anything is possible" never tried to slam a revolving door.

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

A wise man once said, "I don't know, go ask a woman."

I'm not so good with advice. May I offer a sarcastic comment?

I get plenty of exercise; jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines.

Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?

Never knock on death's door. Ring the door bell and run like heck. He hates it.

Some people are like slinkies, good for nothing, but they make you smile when you push them down a flight of stairs.

There's nothing that can't be fixed with duct tape, chocolate, or by running it over.

I'm not mean, I just say what most people keep in their heads.

You're a great friend. But if zombies are chasing us, I'm tripping you.

Be the type of woman, that when your feet land on the floor when you get out of bed in the morning, the devil thinks: "Oh, crap! She's up!"

I did not hit you, I simply high-fived your face.

Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring, so I go back to being me.

The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

Slinky Escalator = Endless fun

I ran with scissors, and lived!

A day without sunshine is like...Night.

Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em. If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em. If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em. If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em. If ya can't kill 'em... you're screwed

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that, my children, is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

"I try not to think. It interferes with being nuts"- Leo Valdez, The Mark of Athena

"Behold! The god's chosen beverage. Tremble before the horror of Diet Coke!"- Percy Jackson, The Mark of Athena

you say:

-Take care!

-LOL (Laugh Out Loud).

-I love a man.

-It’s a bird!

-OMG (Oh My God).

-Cool.

-Crazy.

-Geeks.

-Obsessed.

-Weird.

I say:

-Stay Whelmed!

-LLR (Laugh Like Robin).

-I love a clone.

-It’s Robin!

-OMC (Oh My Cheshire)

-Crash

-Asterous

-Wallys

-Loving

-Me

The one won't give up

Friends

1. FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella BEST FRIENDS:Take yours and say 'RUN LIKE THE WIND BULLSEYE!'
2. FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
3. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
4. FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FREAKING AWSOME"
5. FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.
6. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
7. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
8. FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
9. FRIENDS:Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you
10. FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
11. FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
12. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
13. FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say 'its because your gay isn't it?'
14. FRIENDS: Will tell you that you're a great singer even if you're terrible BEST FRIENDS: Will tell you that you suck.
15. FRIENDS: Will ask why you're crying BEST FRIENDS: Will already have a shovel to bury the loser that made you cry.

16. FRIENDS: Hold out their umbrella for you.

17. BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and yell "RUN, RUN!!!"

18. FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

19. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

20. FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

21. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

22. FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

23. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

24. FRIENDS: Will offer to put your book away after class.

25. BEST FRIENDS: Will push their's onto your desk for you do do it.

26. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

27. BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

28. FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with you.

29. BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with you!

30. FRIENDS: Has never seen you cry.

31. BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you're not down anymore.

32. FRIENDS: Ask you to write down your number.

33. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

34. FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

35. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

36. FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

37. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd that left you.

38. FRIENDS: Will ask why you're crying.

39. BEST FRIENDS: Will already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry.

40. FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

41. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

42. FRIENDS: Let you make an idiot of yourself in public

43. BEST FRIENDS: Is up there with you making an idiot out of herself too!

44. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.

45. BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

46. FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter BEST FRIENDS:Will repost this!!

NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast

PJO FANS: will tell Zeus to make it rain

NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!

PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS!

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings

PJO FANS: won't go to one because they will take away your awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you!

PJO FANS: say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you!

NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid

PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!

PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers/skills

NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms

PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm down (politely)

NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation

PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood

NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on their profile

PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile!

The girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.

The girl that people call weird either behind my back or to my face.

The girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone.

The girl who has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.

But I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Greek Mythology, who can express herself better with words than without words, and knows the importance of the little things.

You Know You're a Book Nerd If:

You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on. Check

You stay up to read a book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading. Check

Just about everything you do revolves around reading. If you're not reading, you're probably on fanfiction.net, drawing fan art, etc. Check

You try to get all of your friends to read your favorite books. Check

Everything reminds you of the book. (EVERYTHING) Check

You quote random lines all the time. (ALL THE TIME.) Check

You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't. Check

You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class. Maybe...

You have pictures of your favorite characters on your computer. I don't have a computer, but I do have a phone and a tablet!

got a book memorized. Check

You've read a specific book more than five times. *Cough* All 10 PJO Books*Cough*

You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days. Harry Potter counts right?

You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like. Watch out Rick Riordan!

You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional. The entire Percy Jackson cast. (Scratches back of neck).

COPY AND PASTE IF YOU'RE A BOOK NERD AND PROUD OF IT!!!!

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

1. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (the only time I have to work on my hair)

2. On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
3. On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).
5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
6. On Marks Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)
7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
8. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what? Outer space?)
11. On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
12. On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash. Are there peas inside too?)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
14. On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
16. On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yes, because I always straighten my hair when I'm taking a bath.)

17. On T-Rat (Military food):Its not for Human Consumption, Animals and Military Use only... (Hey, easy on the military bashing, they're humans too!)

18. On a birthday card for a one year old: Not suitable for children aged under 36 months or less. (Leap-year kids only.)

19. On a bottle of hair dye: Do not use as Ice Cream topping. (I'm sure it'd taste wonderful, but it's just not healthy.)
20. On a blowtorch: Not used for drying hair (What if you want your hair to catch on fire? *innocent look*)
21. On a push along lawn mower: Not to be used as a hedge trimmer. (How would that even work?)
22. On a box of fireworks: Do not put in mouth.
23. On the packaging for a wrist watch: Warning this is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants. (What's the story behind that one?)
24. In a dishwasher manual: Do not allow children to play in dishwasher. (...I'm gonna be serious, can they fit?)
25. On a toaster: Do not use underwater. (Why? What'll happen? Fish come to the surface with x's for eyes.)
26. On a mattress: Do not attempt to swallow. ('Cause every person can fit a mattress in their mouths. How did they even come up with that one?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

Some Random stuff for your entertainment (which no one will probably ever read)

I'm too tired to punch you. Would you please run your face into my fist repeatedly? (Better yet, punch yourself so I don't have to hold my hand up.)

What girls don't seem to know: when a guy acts like he hates you, chances are, he likes you.

What guys don't seem to know: when a girl acts like she hates you, chances are, she hates you.

If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'? Congress? Thought so.

'You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor...'

People say that I have totally lost it. I wasn't even aware I had it.

-I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?!

Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!

I live in my own little world – but it is okay they know me there.

If your heart was really broken...you'd be dead so shut up.

God made men...then he had a better idea...

Getting older in inevitable – growing up is optional

Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.

Observe the art of getting what you want. Watch, learn, and don't eat my banana.

Time is a good teacher. It's just bad he kills all his pupils.

Just when I think you said the most stupid thing ever, you keep on talking.

Never suffer from insanity, enjoy every minute of it.

When people say, "It's always in the last place you look." Say to them, "Well of course it is! Why the hell would I keep looking for it after I found it?!"

Better to keep your mouth shut and have people think you’re a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. (Mark Twain)

The newscaster is the person who says “Good evening” and then tells you why it’s not.

Don’t take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly.

If you don’t laugh at yourself, I’ll be glad to do it for you. :)

Be insane … because well behaved girls never made history.

I am absolutely awesome (agree or die).

If you’re gonna be two faced, sweetie, at least make one of them pretty.

Dementors: Turning people emo since 370 B.C.

I'm not insensitive, I just don't care

A good girl is just a bad girl who's never gotten caught.

When everything's coming your way, you're on the wrong side of the road.

A secret admirer is only a stalker with stationary.

What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding.

Oops! Did my sarcasm hurt your feelings?

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Children... you spend 2 years teaching them how to walk and talk, you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut up

I am NOT saying you're stupid...I'm just implying it.

Whoever said that nothing's impossible obviously hasn't tried slamming a revolving door.

Whoever said "Words don't hurt" obviously hasn't gotten a hard-back encyclopedia thrown at his head before.

If you do it, you'll regret it. If you don't do it, you'll regret it. Either way, you're still gonna regret it, so why not just do it?

OMG! THE RAIN'S WET!

I'm gonna live forever!...Or die trying.

I'm probably the coolest dork you'll ever meet.

It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces.

You know you're a geek when procrastination doesn't affect your grades.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear intelligent until you hear them speak.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun!

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do, kill me?

It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?

When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else

Real girls aren’t perfect, and perfect girls aren’t real.

I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.

What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.

Friends are relatives you make for yourself

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the Escape key.

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

You can't enjoy practical jokes when you feel like one.

Dear math, Stop asking for us to find your X, shes not coming back, and don't ask Y either..

The real danger of chewing gum at school isn't being caught by your teachers, its being caught by your friends, next thing you know, BAM! Empty pack of gum.

I dream of a better tomorrow-where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned.

I am nobody. Nobody's perfect. Therefore, I am perfect.

When life gives you lemons, throw them back at life and demand The Blood of Olympus instead.

I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

They say guns don’t kill people, people kill people. Well, I’m pretty sure the guns help because if you stood there and shouted ‘BANG’ I don’t think you’d kill a lot of people.

A friend will ring your doorbell and wait patiently, but a best friend will pound on your door incessantly until you open it fifteen seconds later and say ‘This situation could have been avoided if you had simply left your door unlocked!

I don’t have a dog. I eat my own homework.

Guitar, for sale … Cheap … no strings attached.

Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.

Define 'normal'.

(Say to a boy :) Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder.

If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

Don't count the days, make the days count.

I'm not crazy, you're just more sane than I am.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you.

I used up all my sick days...so I called in dead.

You're laughing now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

My door is always open, so feel free to leave.

We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors, but they still learn to live in the same box.

Slinky Escalator = Endless fun!

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

When my mother is mad... she doesn't glare daggers, oh no... she glares pitch-forks!

- What are you talking about? I don't get distracted easi- OH, A SQUIRREL!!!

- MATH: Mental Abuse To Humans

- Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

- Sanity is overrated. Try insanity!

- Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

- Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

- Parents are odd. They spend the first few years of your life teaching you to walk and talk, and the rest telling you to sit down and shut up.

- I believe in a world where chickens can cross the road WITHOUT their motives questioned!

- What do we want? PROCRASTINATION! When do we want it? ...Next week.

- There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

- An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

- When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you melons...you're dyslexic.

- Sarcasm isn't an attitude, it's an ART.

- You say "psycho" like it's a bad thing...

- Knowledge is power; power is the root of all-evil. Therefore studying is evil.

- You know what?! Earth sucks, I’m going home.

- The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

- A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

- Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

- Being crazy is like being normal, only better!

- I'm not very good with advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

- Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall down stairs!

- God made man, knew he could do better, and made woman.

- I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny.

- Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing!

This next bout of insanity is from MyLittleRobin

Smile... even though it freaks other people out.

There's a fine line between sanity and insanity. I believe I crossed it several hundred miles back.

Fate drove me here, then told me to get out of the car.

When there's an awkward silence... "FOR NARNIA!"

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute.

I'll try being nicer when you try being smarter.

Ah... Medieval Times. When boys opened doors for girls instead of trampling them on their way out. Those were the good old days.

Keep smiling –– it makes everyone wonder what you're up to.

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Normal people scare me... but not as much as I scare them.

I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

It is better to keep your mouth shut and make people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

I wasn't calling you names. I was stating the obvious.

I'm sick of all this talk about vampires and werewolves. What we really need is a good book about unicorns.

That which doesn't kill you... will probably try again.

The difference between brilliance and stupidity is that brilliance has its limits.

I respect your opinion. I just think it's stupid.

You have the right to remain silent, so please just shut up.

I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.

I didn't slap you! I just gave you a high five in the face.

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Strangers stab you in the front.

Friends stab you in the back.

Boyfriends stab you in the heart.

Best friends poke you with straws.

I dream of a better tomorrow –– where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned.

They told me I could become anything. So I became a rock.

Bookstores are one of the only pieces of evidence we have left that people are still thinking.

I ran with scissors. And lived.

I am nobody. Nobody's perfect. Therefore, I am perfect.

I did what they said and took the road less traveled –– now where the heck am I?

An apple a day keeps the doctor away –– if well aimed.

DRINK COFFEE! Do stupid things faster with more energy!

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

What happens when you're scared half to death twice?

My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it's gone.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Did you know sarcasm is your body's natural defense against stupidity?

Don't follow me. I'm lost too.

The world is full of crazy people. They made me their leader.

Don't mess with me. I've got a stick.

Smile, because I have no idea what is going on!

Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are vegetables?

One way to figure out how things work –– push all the buttons!

What is this normal you speak of? Is it contagious? Stay away! I might catch your normal!

Without those blonde moments, life would be so dull.

When women are depressed, they eat chocolate or go shopping. When men are depressed, they invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional...

Cheese... milk's leap toward immortality.

If you say "gullible" really slow, it sounds like "oranges"!

Without ME, it's just AWESO.

Come to the nerd side. We have pi!

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... and spiders.

Raisin cookies are the reason why I have trust issues.

On a scale of 1 to 10, what's your favorite color in the alphabet?

There is a fine line between numerator and denominator.

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

I hate rhyming.

Zebra.

The following statement is true.

The previous statement is false.

The cactus wants a hug.

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it.

I see regular people!

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Silence is golden and duct tape is silver. You choose.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

I'm so gangster. I carry a squirt gun.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three!

If you can't fix it with duct tape, you haven't used enough.

I didn't lose my mind. I sold it on eBay!

There is no "I" in "team" but if you switch around a couple letters, there is definitely a "ME"...

There are three kinds of people in the world: ones that can count, and ones that can't.

I can only please one person a day. Today's not your day, and tomorrow's not looking good either...

The person who smiles when things go wrong is thinking of a list of people to blame it on.

I am NOT saying you're stupid. I am merely implying it.

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Usually, it belongs to an incoming express train.

Just when I thought that you said the stupidest thing ever, you kept talking.

Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.

An idiot is a window washer who steps back to admire the wonderful cleaning job he did on the 44th floor.

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

In order to lose your mind, you must have one in the first place.

All people have the right to stupidity; some just abuse that privilege.

Why be difficult when, with just a little effort, you can be impossible?

I have two rules:

One, that I am never wrong;

And two, if I am wrong, refer to rule one...

When giving lethal injections, the doctors first sterilize the needles. I have one question that I would love to ask –– "WHY?"

He who claps last is not paying attention.

Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

I'm not random. You just can't think as fast as me.

MOO... I'm a fish

Give me candy –– OR ELSE.

Notice how "or else" is bolded, capitalized, and italicized.

Think.

Do you really want to mess with me?

The question is not whether or not you have the right to remain silent. The question is whether or not you have the capacity.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Some see the glass as half full, some see it as half empty. Me? I just want to know who the heck is drinking my soda.

The greener grass on the other side is probably artificial turf.

Practice makes perfect, but since nobody's perfect, why practice?

Education is important. School, however, is another matter.

It takes 47 muscles to frown, 13 to smile, and absolutely none at all to sit there with a dumb look on your face.

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

Advice is not my forte. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Slinky plus escalator equals endless fun

I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall be quick and painless.

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationery.

It's not stealing. It's borrowing with no intention of giving back.

Procrastinators: the leaders of tomorrow.

Tu madre. You just got burned in Spanish.

Chocolate is the answer no matter what the question is.

It's okay, Pluto. I'm not a planet either.

At this moment, you're the oldest you've ever been. Deep, huh?

If people were meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters.

Worst time to have a heart attack: during a game of charades.

Whoever said that nothing is impossible has obviously never tried eating a liquid.

Whoever said that nothing is impossible has obviously never tried to fly a helicopter upside down.

Whoever said that nothing is impossible has obviously never tried nailing Jell-O to a tree.

Whoever said that nothing is impossible has obviously never tried lining up a group of people alphabetically according to height.

Come to the Dark Side. We have COOKIES!

Welcome to the Dark Side. Are you surprised that we lied about the cookies?

Come to the Light Side. We have ICE CREAM!

Welcome to the Light side. Heh, sorry, we're out of ice cream.

Don't attempt a staring contest with a brick wall. They cheat a lot.

When someone annoys you, remember that it takes 47 muscles to frown but just 4 muscles to stretch out your arm and punch the crap out of them.

Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon.

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.

If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.

9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

I didn't trip. I was just doing a random gravity test.

If I'm not back in five minutes... wait longer!

I've got a problem for your solution.

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead.

I didn't fight my way to the top of a food chain to be a vegetarian.

Microsoft bought Skype for 8.5 billion! What a bunch of idiots. I downloaded it for free.

War does not determine who is right... only who is left.

Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Diamonds are a girl's best friend because they're sharper than knives.

Relax. Nothing is okay.

Just say no to drugs. Because if your drugs are talking to you, you've probably had too many.

Never do anything you don't want to explain to the paramedics.

You have the right to remain silent. I have the right to ignore whatever you say. Either way, it works in my favor.

We're not retreating, we're just advancing in a different direction.

I was going to take over the world, but then I saw a shiny thing.

The Tooth Fairy teaches kids that it's okay to sell body parts.

Be insane, because well behaved girls never made history.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is GOING somewhere.

You're a special kind of stupid, aren't you?

The doctor says that we have multiple personalities.

I like work. It fascinates me. I can sit and stare at it for hours.

The early bird gets the worm, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.

They never suspect the short one.

Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over.

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Anyone else having trouble getting to Narnia?

I've used up all of my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Stereotyping? How do you type with a stereo?

People know don't know me think I'm quiet. People who do wish I was.

Hey stupid! Your sock is untied!

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

I'm not as random as you think I salad.

On a scale of 1 to crazy I'm a penguin.

I see no good reason to act my age.

Hey you! Yeah you! No, not you, the other guy! You right there! Yes, you! Do you like tacos?

I tried being normal, but I didn't like it.

Out of my mind. Be back in five minutes.

Normality will be restored as soon as we figure out what it is.

Flying is not inherently dangerous –– crashing is.

Thanks to IronSupremacy for the prompts, deleted what didnt apply to me, but I got it from... This person.

YOUR GUY SIDE

You love hoodies.

You love jeans.

Dogs are better than cats.

It can be hilarious when people get hurt.

You've played with/against boys on a team.

Shopping is torture.

Sad movies suck.

You own/ed an X-Box.

Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.

At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.

Gory movies are cool.

You like going to high school football games.

Baggy pants are cool to wear.

It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.

Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.

You love to go crazy and not care what people think.

Sports are fun

Talk with food in your mouth.

Sleep with your socks on at night.

YOUR GIRL SIDE

Go to your mom for advice.

You hate wearing the color black.

You like wearing jewelry. (Sometimes)

You don't like the movie Star Wars.

You smile a lot more than you should. (But I'm just crazy...)

You care about what you look like. (A little bit)

You love the movies.

Used to play with dolls as little kid. (I wish I didn't!)

Like being the star of every thing. (Who doesn't, well, not everything, just some things)

Now, from Monkeygirl77,

BFANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS!! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? WTF!? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it!! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England), ChiyoChiyamamoto (USA), Crazy-Monkey13 (USA) Mittensx7768 (USA), Darkness Incarnated (USA), monkeygirl77 (USA), Firecracker-TheBatCrazyDemigod (USA).

This is from the profile of SimplyBatman

Just remember if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.

Say no to drugs.

Say yes to McDonalds.

I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the tables and the chairs are bullies and the walls get in my way.

When someone knocks on your door...

10% say " who is it?"

64% look through the peep hole

25% open the door

1% crawl around on the ground like a ninja and look through the window very quietly to make sure it isn't a masked murderer.

Wow I AM weird

Never go to bed angry...

Stay awake and plot your revenge.

If you ever see me smiling on a Monday, you'll know that an alien has killed me and is wearing my skin as a disguise

"Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed."

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

Congrats! I you read through most of that, I made you smile! And that is one of my goals XD.

Seriously, if you made it through most of that, you've realised I like putting random nonsense in my profile, and that's okay, I like random nonsense!

This is story-related information will be.

Any story predating 2017: These stories have all been abandoned or completed, with the exception of my Wildfire and Robindanewsie related stories which are on hiatus.

Severus's Secret: This will updated weekly or biweekly.

My Demons: The original is abandoned, but I am slowly rewriting it, along with adding a precursor story as well.

Robindanewsie: These stories will be updated when she updates or when I get inspiration.