Rita Hill
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Joined 07-27-05, id: 864772
Author has written 29 stories for Pirates of the Caribbean, Sleepy Hollow, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Beetlejuice, Edward Scissorhands, and Secret Window.

If you experience diarrhea, extreme nausea, vomiting, vertigo, drowsiness, headache, fever, deep depression, thoughts of suicide, thoughts of pulling your stomach out with a spoon, loss of bladdercontrol,or internal bleeding after reading everything written below the dotted line contact your doctor immediately. Ask your doctor if Rita Hill's profile is right for you!

Once upon a time there was an author who had absolutely nothing better to do with her life so she decided to make a Fanfiction account. However, this particular author did notalone make a Fanficiton account to write stories, but so she could also write down this paragraph in her profile. And that author was...

Rita Hill.

Age: 16

My favorite eras: anything from the 50s-70s!

Hobbies: I act, I play the piano, I write poetry, lyrics, and short stories, and I love hair!

Favorite Famous People: Johnny Depp, Gene Wilder , Mel Brooks, Denis Leary, Nathan Lane, Steve Martin, Seth Green, Conan O'Brian, Mel Brooks, Dom Deluise, and Michael Ian Black.

Favorite Shows: Listing them has been known to kill small animals and destroy the rainforest...oh,it is also known to bore readers.

Favorite Movies: The Jerk, The World's Greatet Lover, Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother, The Producers, The Producers remake, High Anxiety, Silent Movie, Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein, Dracula: Dead and Loving It, The Sixth Sense, History of the World Part I, the Pink Panther, Beetlejuice, Edward Scissorhands, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Haunted Honeymoon, Life Stinks, Fatso, Sleepy Hollow, Secret Window, Anchorman,and the entire Austin Powers Series... and probably more. :)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Jack Sparrow's Shoulder Angels by Shadows and Smoke reviews
You know there are two tiny versions of yourself that sit on your shoulders: a devil and an angel? Jack Sparrow has them too. POTC COTBP, told in the point of view by Jack's shoulder angels. Now rated for mild language. PLEASE R&R!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 15,624 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 5/31/2007 - Published: 3/15/2006
The Jack Sparrow Rap by BG Sparrow reviews
One-shot. Jack does a rap. Self explanitory, don't you think? If you're curious, go on and read it. I guarentee you'll love it. NEW! The Jack Sparrow Rap in PotC: The Musical! You'll still love it. :D
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,459 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 5/29/2007 - Published: 7/9/2005 - Complete
Colour My World by SohoNora reviews
Mort Rainey's secret had been found out, and he has been sent to a mental institution. No Doritos. No Mountain Dew. And you can bet Mort isn't all that pleased about it. But things start looking up when a new girl is admitted....
Secret Window - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,508 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 5/20/2007 - Published: 4/8/2006
A Pirate Captain by Jack's Savvy Lass reviews
Just a little poem that I wrote while I was supposed to be studying! Please R&R!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 115 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/15/2006 - Complete
Head Props Are People Too! by wayunlucky13 reviews
This is a OneShot the movie outline told by the feather on Barbossa's head...It has opinions funny names and secrets you'd never think of...
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,680 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/13/2006 - Published: 4/23/2006
Careful What You Wish For by Too Lazy reviews
Captain Sparrow working as a laughed at constable in New York City? Constable Crane acting as the most feared Pirate in the Spanish main? Let the insanity of body swtiching begin.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,777 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/16/2006 - Published: 8/4/2005 - Capt. Jack Sparrow, Elizabeth S.
An End to the Tale? by Jacquelin Sparrow reviews
Jack Sparrow's most recent escape from death has left him questioning his life. But the sea is a demanding mistress, and will not loose such a lover easily...
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,957 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/13/2006 - Published: 5/9/2006
A Kiss for the Ages by Astrid Rose reviews
WARNING: SPOILERS FOR DMC A dramatization of the “kiss of death” scene between Jack and Elizabeth. Oneshot. JE
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,715 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/10/2006 - Complete
The rum diary by Captain Jack Dreamer reviews
Captain Jack Sparrow trapped on Rum runners island. What really happened all those years ago. How does Bootstrap Bill come to his sticky end?
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,798 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/19/2006 - Published: 2/17/2006 - Complete
The Ballad of Jack Sparrow by RpGGaMeR reviews
A poem about everyone's favorite pirate.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 762 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 12/19/2005 - Published: 6/29/2005
Fleeing the Hosreman by Arzosah reviews
A poem for the Headless Horseman, and his method of giving chase to his victems.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 194 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/12/2005 - Complete
Sleepy Hollow by sonicstardust reviews
A poem about the movie, Sleepy Hollow.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 116 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/24/2004 - Complete
Yesterday and Tomorrow by Acadienne reviews
Sleepy Hollow Ichabod Crane struggles with each night of memories and is in need to reach out to someone. please read andor review
Misc. Movies - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 228 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/12/2004 - Complete
If Jack Sparrow Came to School by Tailynn reviews
What would happen if Jack Sparrow came to school? An unusually attentive class and a confused teacher, that's what.....
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 254 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 5 - Published: 2/5/2004
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Seven Days of Jack Sparrow Creation reviews
Or you can just say a continuation of the Seven Days of Creation, “Jack Sparrow” style.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 533 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/13/2006 - Complete
Pirates of the Caribbean: Jack and Elizabeth Kiss reviews
This is a poem about the Jack Sparrow and Elizabeth Turner's kiss scene in the Pirates of the Caribbean 2 trailer. It is in Elizabeth’s point of view where she is going against everything she believed in and her part in life with Will to kiss Jack.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 177 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/10/2006 - Complete
Mort Rainey: Hello, There reviews
A poem when Mort Rainey is just about to kill his wife. Hehe. It's not graphic don't worry.
Secret Window - Rated: M - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 103 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/13/2006 - Complete
How Ichabod Crane Despises the Look Of Love reviews
A poem where Ichabod Crane begins to fall in love with the beautiful Katrina, but reminds himself that he's not.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 178 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/7/2006 - Complete
Ichabod Crane is Crying reviews
A poem about how Ichabod Crane secretly misses his magical childhood.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 137 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/6/2006 - Complete
The Days of Scissorhands reviews
Kim reflects on the days when she used to know Edward Scissorhands.
Edward Scissorhands - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 175 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/4/2006 - Complete
Katrina Van Tassel reviews
A poem that uses Katrina's appearance and elaborates it into a love poem.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 227 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/19/2005
Sleepy Hollow's Halloween Tale reviews
A Halloween spirited poem for Sleepy Hollow.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 176 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/19/2005
Beetlejuice Looks reviews
A short poem reflecting dear old Beetlejuice’s features. Of course, like usual, I had a picture affront of me helping me write out this.
Beetlejuice - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 183 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/29/2005
Edward Scissorhand's Features reviews
A poem reflecting all of Edward Scissorhands’ very misleading features.
Edward Scissorhands - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 206 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/29/2005
Don't Say His Name reviews
A poetic warning not to say Beetlejuice three times.
Beetlejuice - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 303 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/28/2005
Pirates of the Caribbean Spelling Poem reviews
A poem where I use the letters in Pirates of the Caribbean to describe something of the movie.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 244 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/27/2005
Jack Sparrow and the Seven Dwarfs reviews
A spoof off the Disney movie in Pirates of the Caribbean form.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 539 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/25/2005
Welcome to the Black Pearl reviews
A very bad parody of the song “Welcome to the Jungle” for the movie Pirates of the Caribbean.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 319 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/25/2005
The Jack Sparrow Commandments reviews
Ten Commandments in the name of Jack Sparrow.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 200 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/25/2005
And the Lord Said, “Let there be Crane” reviews
The biblical story behind Ichabod Crane.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 372 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/25/2005
In the Eyes of Ichabod's Mother reviews
A poem in the eyes of Ichabod Crane's mother.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K - English - Spiritual/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 133 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/24/2005
Looking At a Picture of Ichabod Crane reviews
A poem I wrote when I was looking at a picture of Ichabod Crane. In short, I describe what I saw.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 242 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/24/2005
Sleepy Hollow's Hero Missing In Action reviews
A poem reflecting what would have happened if the movie Sleepy Hollow ended the way the book did, with Brom alive, of course.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K - English - Drama/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 180 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 8/24/2005
Agent Sands and the Angry Chef reviews
This is a parody of the movie, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, where a chef is trying to get just revenge on Agent Sands.
Once Upon a Time in Mexico - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 321 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 8/24/2005
Ichabod Crane Pleads reviews
A short epic on my personal favorite scene where Ichabod Crane pleads that he had sen the Headless Horseman.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 127 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/22/2005
Ichabod Crane's First Opinion of Sleepy Hollow reviews
A poem in Ichabod Crane's perspective on how he first views the ideas of the people of Sleepy Hollow.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 133 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/21/2005
The Headless Horseman Kills His Next Victim reviews
A poem that follows the Headless Horseman as he follows his next victim.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: T - English - Horror/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 195 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/21/2005
Jack Sparrow Asks Why the Rum is Gone reviews
This is a little poetic joke written in Captain Jack Sparrow's point of view of one of my favorite scenes, which I consider the rum scene.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 193 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/20/2005
Katrina Van Tassel: I Come to Question reviews
A poem written in Katrina Van Tassel's point of view from the movie Sleepy Hollow where she curses the day Ichabod Crane came to Sleepy Hollow
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 111 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/19/2005
Katrina Van Tassel's Poem to Ichabod Crane reviews
A poem made in Katrina Van Tassel's point of view. It discusses how she visualizes love and how it relates to Constable Ichabod Crane played by Johnny Depp in Tim Burton's Sleepy Hollow.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 290 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/18/2005
Jack Sparrow Meets Rita Hill reviews
Captain Jack Sparrow is keeping a secret from Rita. What extent will he go to prevent her from finding out, or does she need any convincing?
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 647 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 8/18/2005
Ichabod Crane's search for Jack Sparrow reviews
Sleepy Hollow's Ichabod Crane is on an expedition to find a dangerous outlaw, namely Pirate of the Caribbean's Jack Sparrow. Will Crane prove as a threat to Sparrow?
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,142 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 8/2/2005 - Published: 7/30/2005
Ichabod Crane's Evidence Turns to Ash reviews
A scene from the movie Sleepy Hollow where Katrina Van Tassel and Ichabod Crane are thrown into a conspiracy. Written in Ichabod Crane's perspective.
Sleepy Hollow - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 632 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/1/2005