Penguins Stealing My Sanity
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Joined 08-25-05, id: 885073, Profile Updated: 01-03-09
Author has written 16 stories for Valdemar universe, Harry Potter, Brokeback Mountain, and M*A*S*H.

A longish semi-autobiography that I really don't expect anyone to read, yet which I insist on updating every once in a while for...no reason at all, other than that I like to talk about myself.

Name: Hate it. Refuse to write it.
Gender: Female
Age: 18. Don't judge me based on my age, because that would make me sad. It's not my fault I was born when I was. Youth =/= bad writing. I'll prove it to you--read my stuff.
Location: I'm a bit paranoid when it comes to telling people where I live. Stalkers and all that jazz, I'm sure you understand. USA is as much as you're going to get from me.

And now...
Mostly Random Stuff About Me:

I tend to babble on. And rant. Ranting is fun.

Before you get much farther, know that I really am smarter than I make myself sound. I just enjoy being...unique. You'll have to live with it.

As far as my writing goes, I seem to be a slash writer when it comes to fanfiction. Original fiction-wise, I'm a fantasy writer.

My religion is fairly nonexistant. I'm not an athiest--I do beleive in a higher power, I just don't worship it. Organized religion of any sort bothers me.

I speak fluent sarcasm.

I like rock music, specifically alt rock, and I've entered a pop-y phase now. My favorite bands are Secondhand Serenade, Evans Blue, Tool, Elbow, Belle and Sebastian, Fair To Midland, 10 Years, A Perfect Circle, Snow Patrol...and some others I can't be bothered to remember. Not that you care, but I like talking about me. And who knows, if we have the same musical interests, perhaps we'll someday form a life-long bond of friendship based on a mutual love of the bands I mentioned.

My favorite movies are Donnie Darko, Silence of the Lambs, and Sweeney Todd; other good movies are Hard Candy, Pride and Prejudice, Juno, The Departed, The Producers, Brokeback Mountain, Pirates of the Caribbean (the first one, not so much the others), Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and...some others, I'm sure, but thinking is just too much work right now.

My favorite TV shows are Six Feet Under, MASH, Pushing Daisies, Dexter, Boston Legal, Grey's Anatomy, Desperate Houswives, Criminal Minds, Will & Grace, and C.S.I.

My favorite authors are Lynn Flewelling (Nightrunner series), Thomas Harris (Hannibal books), Scott Lynch (Locke Lamora books), Trudi Canavan (The Black Magician Trilogy), Sarah Monette (the Melusine books), Tanya Huff (the Keeper books), Carol Berg (Lighthouse duology, D'Arnath books, Song of the Beast), Jacqueline Carey, David Gemmell, and Ann Marston, pretty much in that order. I also like the Twilight Series, Tamora Pierce, and the Harry Potter books, but I'm more into adult fantasy...

J’adore le français.

I love fantasy. Enough said.

I like to think of myself as an artist. Heh.


Some of my favorite quotes:

"Insanity is just a state of mind." -Hawkeye Pierce, MASH

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." - Albert Einstein

"Not only am I having conversations with myself, but now I'm refusing to talk to me. This has got to be the first sign of maddness." -Sonea, The High Lord

"Chaos is great. Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling." -J.D., Heathers

"You can't just go hacking your way out of every difficult situation that arises. It's uncivilized." -Seregil, from Lynn Flewelling's Luck in the Shadows

"I made a new friend."
"Real or imaginary?"
"Imaginary." - Donnie and Dr. Thurman, Donnie Darko

"There's more to you than there is to you!" -Max Bialystock, The Producers

"Nuditity makes me breathe funny!" -Radar, MASH

"Anything's possible...if it happens." - Oxnard Montalvo, from The Angry Beavers (the best old cartoon ever made)

"One by one, the penguins are stealing my sanity." - the best shirt in the world, which I didn't have enough money to buy and haven't been able to find anywhere ever again

"The insanity keeps me sane." - Me, whenever the opportunity presents itself

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Anamnesis in Full Revolution by Breathing Neptune reviews
Sweeney unravels and ties the past with the present. Anthony presses where he’s not wanted. Warning for rape and slash.
Sweeney Todd - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,511 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/3/2008 - Complete
Hot Under The Collar by Olive Drab reviews
It's hot. Everyone's in a bad mood
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,918 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/20/2007 - Published: 6/10/2007 - Complete
Breaking Point by misanthrope1 reviews
Warning: Mature, dark, dark themes. Slash, Rape. LONG. BJHawkeye pairing. I had Submitted this story before and am resubmitting it in chapters.
M*A*S*H - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 24 - Words: 39,257 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 6/5/2007 - Published: 2/25/2007 - BJ H., Hawkeye P. - Complete
Something Afoot by Olive Drab reviews
Oneshot. Spring has come to the 4077th, but one member of the gang has a problem. Just a bit of fun. Enjoy!
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,189 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Published: 4/6/2007 - Complete
The Only Woman I Ever Loved by Olive Drab reviews
After the event of Comrades in Arms, Hawkeye feels he owes Margaret an explanation. It's not quite what she expected.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,074 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 11 - Published: 3/22/2007 - Complete
Just a Kid by Olive Drab reviews
Oneshot. Colonel Potter helps BJ come to terms with a difficult day.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,362 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/13/2007 - Complete
Into Darkness by Olive Drab reviews
Hawkeye borrows a tape recorder after his eyes are damaged in the episode Out of Sight, Out of Mind.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 579 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/16/2006 - Hawkeye P. - Complete
BBM: A number of musings on Ennis and Jack by stevehtx reviews
Last BBM Story: Postcards and Shirts
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 53 - Words: 111,243 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 11/19/2006 - Published: 1/10/2006 - Complete
Inside My Mind by hawkeye-heart 'n Seoul reviews
I can't explain it... you'll just have to read it. A twist on Hawkeye's battle against all that Korea throws at him.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,442 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Hawkeye P. - Complete
Slow Fade by comeawayeasy reviews
Jack remembers a most amazing moment he and Ennis shared one time when they spent a few days in the mountains together.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,752 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/15/2006 - Complete
BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN: THE ESSENTIAL SCRIPT by A Horse Called Hwin reviews
Posting on behalf of Baum. BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN script rewritten. With the Deleted Scenes.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,601 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 3/7/2006 - Published: 2/24/2006 - Complete
Human Interest by MadLori reviews
AU 1983: A reporter visits the small town of Farmingdale, Vermont, and is intrigued to learn about two men who run a ranch together outside of town...but when she meets them, the story she hopes to write takes on new significance.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 144,929 - Reviews: 777 - Favs: 639 - Follows: 145 - Updated: 3/3/2006 - Published: 1/19/2006 - Complete
Taken In by Spidersting reviews
The first of a series of episodes from the lives of Ennis del Mar and Jack Twist.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,572 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/21/2006
How Brokeback Got Them Good II by Spidersting reviews
Love poem 2 for Jack and Ennis, this time concerning the second night in the pup tent.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 183 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/13/2006 - Complete
Catching the Western Train by Jack-Twist reviews
What if Jack didn't die? What if he faked it? What if this document told you what REALLY happened?
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,331 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 2/12/2006 - Published: 2/10/2006
A Dying Wind by comeawayeasy reviews
Ennis Del Mar makes his first and last trip up to Brokeback Mountain since spending the summer up there with Jack in 1963.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,125 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/10/2006 - Complete
Worth The Wait by Youthfuldreams reviews
No one survives a sad ending. . .But Im a sucker for happy ones. Just read. Slash. EnnisJack ofcourse UPDATED 01 29 06
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,817 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/29/2006 - Published: 1/24/2006
In Which Slash Clichés are Rampantly Abused by moosemaster reviews
Just what the title says- in response to the cliché challenge on the Mash Slash message board. (absurd and silly slash, of course)
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,194 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 4 - Published: 9/20/2004
Everyone's a Stranger by Epigone1 reviews
The return of George to the 4077th forces BJ to acknowledge a new aspect of his own life in the camp. A co-fic by Meredith Bronwen Mallory and Epigone. Completed. [Slash]
M*A*S*H - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,534 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 14 - Updated: 12/25/2003 - Published: 11/8/2003 - Complete
Rawhide and Bloody Hawk by A. V. Meren reviews
Hawkeye is afraid of monsters. Not a happy story.
M*A*S*H - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,032 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/5/2003
Chemistry by Raven25 reviews
It's all about the chemistry. A tale of the early days of the M*A*S*H.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,796 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/27/2003
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

In Love and War reviews
FINAL CHAPTER NOW UP. Trapper never left, and now BJ’s been assigned to the 4077. The flames of love are fanned, and sparks fly. Slash: HawkeyeTrapper and HawkeyeBJ. Alternately humorous, romantic, angsty, and maybe a little overly dramatic.
M*A*S*H - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 76,753 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 10/15/2007 - Published: 7/16/2007 - Hawkeye P., BJ H. - Complete
Forgotten reviews
Written for the 10minute prompt 'forgotten'. Slash: BJHawk or TrapHawk, take your pick. It works either way.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 414 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/19/2007 - Hawkeye P., BJ H. - Complete
Salvation reviews
Written for the 10minute prompt of 'sweltering'. Hawkeye's solution to a hot day. BJHawkeye slash.
M*A*S*H - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,097 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/4/2007 - BJ H., Hawkeye P. - Complete
He Says reviews
Written for the 10minute prompt 'he said'.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 396 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9/4/2007 - Complete
Hard Labor reviews
A rather pointless, but fun, little 'MASH moment,' I guess. Hawkeye tricks BJ. No slash.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 623 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 8 - Published: 9/4/2007 - BJ H., Hawkeye P. - Complete
The Sound of Silence reviews
Hawkeye, after being seriously wounded, has a mental breakdown, leaving it up to BJ and Sidney Freedman to patch him back up. NO slash, but plenty of angst. A little dark and grim, with some slightly bloody descriptions and talk of suicide.
M*A*S*H - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,726 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/8/2007 - Published: 7/2/2007 - Hawkeye P., BJ H. - Complete
Needful Things reviews
My needful things: the things I could look back on to help myself remember, to keep from forgetting the important events of my life, to remind myself that I hadn’t always been in this Hell on Earth, to keep myself sane. HawkBJ slash
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,422 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/22/2007 - Hawkeye P., BJ H. - Complete
Sideways reviews
Hawkeye deals with stress in his own way, by looking at the world from a whole new perspective.
M*A*S*H - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,060 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/20/2007 - Hawkeye P., BJ H. - Complete
BBM Compilation reviews
A number of BBM fics I've written: a handful of oneshots and a few miniseries.
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 32,907 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/12/2006 - Published: 4/8/2006
What He Wants reviews
Jack faked his death, and now he’s off to find Ennis and start their life together. But it’s not always that simple… Chapter Five reposted with slight changes, Chapter Six now posted, too. Finished...for now...
Brokeback Mountain - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,145 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 3/6/2006 - Published: 2/13/2006 - Complete
Love Lost reviews
“You can’t be alone forever.” Vanyel is dead, but can Stefen find love again? Is that love what it seems? Slash, nothing graphic. On hiatus until I find the inspiration to continue.
Valdemar universe - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,591 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 9/12/2005 - Published: 8/28/2005
Through The Iris reviews
Harry begins to feel a strange emotion towards his nemesis, but is he in love or in lust? crappy summary... Oneshot, slash, songfic. HPDM
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,597 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/11/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Eulogy reviews
Harry is dead. Draco reflects on the past. Oneshot, slash HPDM. It's sad, but I added some amusing parts to relieve the sadness...oh, just read it. I hate summaries...
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,312 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/29/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Fault Line reviews
HPDM slash. A rather pointless bit of fluff inspired by the 10 Years's song Fault Line. As this is a songfic, I named it after the song, mostly because I couldn't think of anything better.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,628 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Published: 8/28/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Rise and Fall reviews
HPDM slash. Oneshot. Harry feels a bit vulnerable, Draco decides to take advangtage... Warning: rape! Oh, and it's a songfic. Read, review, enjoy!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,792 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 9 - Published: 8/28/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
What If reviews
VanStef slash. What if Vanyel had just given in to Stefen’s persistence that night, and hadn’t spent the night on the floor…well, at least not alone… Oneshot, kind of fluff, major smut...
Valdemar universe - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/28/2005 - Complete