The Enchanted Cheesy Soybean
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Joined 12-04-05, id: 943517
Author has written 7 stories for Harry Potter, and Star Wars.

~=-=~The Enchanted Cheesy Soybean~=-=~

the cheese welcomes you...

Thank you for visiting. But in order to proceed you must answer some questions...

you: But we're not talking...


you: How can I answer questions if-


you: Pssh. Well if you're going to snap at me I'm leaving.


you: (taps foot)

(sighs) Alright, you don't have to answer the questions.

you: Good.

...I don't know what to say...

you: Why don't you start with your name?

Are you joking?

you: (shrug)

You could very well be a serial killer. If I give you my name then you'll track me down, stalk me during everyday life, then wait until I'm all alone and POW! You'll kill me.

you: ...

Yeah...scared now huh? Now that I know your plan.

you: But I'm not a-

Sssh! Even walls have ears...

you: ...

Ok, I think we're safe. The trees are dead.

you: What?

The trees? They have ears too, you know.

you: ok...sure...

So, anything else?

you: old are you?


you: right, right. uhm...give a vague idea.

Alright, my age is between 1 day and 120 years.

you: I didn't mean that vague...

oh yeah? yeah, mr. serial killer?

you: for the last time, I'm not-

Alright, yeah sure.

you: If you don't believe me I'm just going to leave-


you: (sigh) Alright, I'll stay, but you have to be nice.

Nice? Sure, I can be nice.

you: I'm thirsty.

(shrugs) so?

you: (snaps fingers) Go get me something to drink.

Pssh. Fine. Wait! I'm not getting you a drink! This profile page is supposed to be about moi, and I'm not getting you anything! Cause I'm no'cho slave, foo!

you: (evil, deep voice) Actually, yes. You are.


you: When you were five you gave me your soul for cheese.

(gasp) (points) SATAN!



you: I'm the...PIZZA DELIVERY GUY!

(enter Psycho theme music and lightning)


you: we done here?

Yeah, sure.

you: ok, I'm going to check out what you've written.

Sure thing. Enjoy. Oh, and if you are bored...check out this site that my good friend FrostyPoop and I created:

This site has a photo gallery that includes some pics that I drew in Paint that go along with my Insane World of Harry Potter story. Check it out because they're pretty good.

you: What kind of a user name is FrostyPoop?

Inside joke.

you: ...ok...

Also, for your viewing pleasure:

This is a Neopets guild that is the best guild that you shall ever find. Want to know what the theme is? Why, Potter Puppet Pals of course. This guild was created by a friend and myself.

you: Neopets is dead.

NEOPETS IS NOT DEAD! Neopets is life... (not really)

you: ...

Oh! And here is a simply superb site created by thecoughadorablecough Neil:

Ok, enough of my drabble.

...hmm...on second thought...

you: Will you just let me get through this so I can read?


you: Well then...I'll just have to do this! (pokes my eye)

AAAAAHHHH! (runs around yelling about my poked out eye and is exiled because I have to wear an eye-patch and I grow old and don't go outside to trim the weeds until my house is overgrown with dying plants and it looks like a swamp and people say the house is haunted and lived in by a witch and children don't dare get near the house because they heard the evil ‘witch’ eats children and soon I die alone and without friends in an ugly old house in a swamp)

You: ...ok...

Read my stories please. or else I shall become an ugly old witch with no friends...all dairy artificial dairy chocolate...n- oooh! A mint! (picks the mint off the floor and dies from poisoning)

Evil Czechoslovakian mice who are planning world domination- HA HA! Vwee 'ave keeled ze last resistaunce! ATTAUCK! on dear friends! And may you not be attacked by evil Czechoslovakian mice.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Harry Potter and the Hot Boy Who Jumps From Trees by Dreamstallion33 reviews
A spoof on the fourth Harry Potter movie. Author’s Warning: May cause severe head nodding in agreement, and erratic bursts of laughter. Author not responsible for: tears of laughter, an urge to throw the GoF DVD at someone, ect. ENJOY! R&R
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,205 - Reviews: 364 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 7/18/2009 - Published: 1/27/2006 - Complete
Little Lady by VeniceGroove reviews
To attend the prestigious all boys Hogwarts school of magic,Lily Evans disguises herself as a boy.Things get interesting when the Marauders take her under their wing,however Potter realizes there is more to their new friend than meets the eye. LJ no slash
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 58,057 - Reviews: 985 - Favs: 497 - Follows: 256 - Updated: 6/15/2007 - Published: 8/25/2005 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
26 Ways to Annoy Darth Vader by Swyn Song reviews
A wierd thing I came up with when I was bored in History. Oneshot. Please R and R.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 743 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/27/2006 - Published: 3/17/2006 - Darth Vader
This Was Flying by FadingSlowly reviews
COMPLETE She detested Quidditch, broomsticks, and anything to do with heights, really. Gravity was her best friend, and she firmly believed that anyone who fancied flying had to be mental, until Potter came along with an offer she couldn't refuse...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,521 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 18 - Published: 6/11/2005 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Their Last Day by crystaltambaia reviews
The Marauders’ and Lily’s last day at Hogwarts. Full of laughter, crying and new beginnings. One Shot
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,541 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 3 - Published: 9/19/2004 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
The Boy's in Love by She's a Star reviews
Ron Weasley's on a mission, and nothing's stopping him from asking Hermione out. Well . . . if he can manage to escape death by pumpkin juice, anyway.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,357 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/12/2004 - Ron W., Hermione G.
saruman goes shopping by Briony reviews
A new upload of old story. A shopping trip, starring Saruman and Grima. Funny, I promise.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,038 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/12/2004 - Saruman, Grima W.
Trapped in WalMart by Blonde Archer reviews
The Fellowship plus Faramir, Arwen and Eowyn go to Wal-Mart so Gandalf can buy his polka CD, but they end up staying longer than they expected! CHAPTER 10 IS NOW UP!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 13,470 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/30/2004 - Published: 2/10/2004
Expressions of Love by She's a Star reviews
Love makes you do the wacky. Ron and Hermione just wish they didn't have to witness aforementioned wacky.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,147 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/7/2004 - Ron W., Hermione G.
A Sudden Realization by She's a Star reviews
A short post-GoF summer vignette in which Ron discovers his not-quite-platonic feelings for a certain bushy-haired bookworm . . . :-)
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 942 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 39 - Published: 5/12/2003 - Ron W.
Erised by She's a Star reviews
After retrieving Ron's Astronomy homework during the middle of the night, he and Hermione stumble upon a very familiar mirror...
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,758 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/2/2003 - Hermione G., Ron W.
All Thanks To The Pumpkin Juice by She's a Star reviews
Ginny has an incident with pumpkin juice which makes her miss the Hogsmeade weekend. Harry, who feels guilty, stays with her....
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,138 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 15 - Published: 5/31/2001
No-Shippers' Anthem by Rage Point reviews
This sprightly song was meant for the forum, but it begged expanding upon. So Rage Point presents, in all its excessively ridiculous but catchy glory, The No-Shippers' Anthem. Enjoy.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 630 - Reviews: 898 - Favs: 1,121 - Follows: 123 - Updated: 5/9/2001 - Published: 5/8/2001
Scar Head = Enemy Mine by Auror5 reviews
A diatribe by a certain Hogwarts student, who definitely has issues. NP
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,200 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 2/8/2001 - Published: 9/6/2000 - Draco M.
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

It Was Hard to Breathe reviews
Completely different from what I usually post. Beginning at the summer of Harry's upcoming seventh year to living with the most unexpected person after the Great Wizarding War as it would later be called. No slash. SeverusHarryfatherson relationship
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 43,906 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 7/19/2007 - Published: 3/12/2006 - Severus S., Harry P.
Why Leia Organa Loves Han Solo reviews
Leia Organa was never successfully sneaky, but today was a day she would not get caught. Her cause for attempting to be inconspicuous? She had grown quite fond of a bottle in Han Solo's quarters, and she was determined to get it.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,068 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/20/2007 - Leia O., Han S. - Complete
How to become a Successful Sith by Darth Vader reviews
Do you find yourself questioning your being a Jedi? Do you find yourself having contradicting feelings that you are constantly being told that you shouldn't have? You shouldn't be a Jedi. Become a Sith in 10 easy steps!
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,093 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Darth Vader - Complete
The Rain Poured reviews
Depressed!Harry fic. The rain pours, he is numb to it. She is dead, and it was all his fault. He was made to kill Voldemort, and he did. But..she wasn't supposed to was supposed to be him. GinnyHarry
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,067 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/20/2006 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
The Insane World of HP2 reviews
The eagerly awaited sequel! It's sixth year now and crazy things are happening again. But wait...What's this about the Curse of the MarySue? Due to the plot, this story includes my insane friends and I. oh, and there is a surprise ending. Mwuahaha!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 17,186 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/15/2006 - Published: 12/29/2005 - Harry P., Ron W.
Christmas Conversations reviews
HPLOTR crossover. Looking for a good story? Well this one includes: Harry trying to take over the world, rabid squirrels, poker playing Ringwraiths and Dementors, German starfish, the Great Cheese, talking spoons, and common randomness. Interrested? eh?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,629 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/28/2005 - Published: 12/11/2005 - Complete
The Insane World of HP reviews
Looking for a spectacular good read? here it is. Follow Harry in his altered 5th year as crazy stuff begins to happen when students shut their brains off. Harry thinks he's a puppet? Hermione eats books? Ron thinks he's a jedi? Intrigued? Than click.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,004 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/10/2005 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete