Hello! My name is Forestwater. I’m an angst and fluff machine specialized in ruining your childhood.

Avatar: The world is quiet here.

Disclaimer: -in a John-Turturro-as-John-Shooter accent- It's mine. Weren't ever anybody else's. . . . . Okay, fine. I don't own anything except my stupid plots and crappy OCs! Way to rub it in my face that all the cool stuff belongs to someone else.

A Quick Lesson in Using and Abusing Grammar:

If you use commas when you should use periods or don’t use commas when you should, you make it sound like the speaker is moving very fast and in too much of a rush to speak correctly, they can’t breathe, they’re overwhelmed, they’re scared and if you don’t use any punctuation at all you force the reader to read faster and faster based on how long it’s been since the last pause it can build up to a crescendo of panic and tension you can build it up more withwordsthatblendtogether — or a sudden stop. Short. Phrases. Punctuated by periods. Give the reader a chance to breathe for a second, before you slowly build up again — or you can use em dashes — to illustrate — panting breath — or sudden movements.

You can and should break grammar rules. But you should do it for a reason, and you have to know the rules before you can break them.

So study grammar. It’s good for your writing.

Stories: You see those little things at the bottom of the page, with the blue letters and stuff? Yep, that's the writing I'm putting out there for the world. Lucky you, world. So . . . here's a brief description for each of them (in chronological order, approximately). I might be harsher on them than I should be, but everyone is their own worst critic.

1. Genesis (February 2006 - November 2006):

The story of an evil relic as it corrupts the innocent who carry it . . . wow, this sounds like Lord of the Rings. Awkward. Anyway, it’s a look at the pre-OOT generation of Zelda characters, mainly Impa, Zelda’s parents (Daphnes and OC), Nabooru, and Ganondorf. It’s my very first story, so it’s not fabulous, but I’m working on fixing it up so it’s not embarrassing. Chapters 1-11 have been updated/edited, and each broken up into two sections. Which means that technically the first 22 chapters you read are edited. The cover was made by myself, using the following images: the font from cooltext, the Triforce found on Google, the skeleton also found on Google, Ganondorf by warningyou, Nabooru by Wictorian-Art, young Impa created on RPG Heroine Maker, and young Zelda and Daphnes created using Fairytale Scene Maker.

2. The Worst Ever Spy Movie (June 2006):

A random fic about what Super Smash Brothers characters get up to in their downtime. . . . Though this one was written around the same time as Genesis, I actually enjoy it quite a bit. The writing quality is about the same, and the fourth wall has been broken so many times that it's practically nonexistent, but it's a comedy, which is a bit more lenient and thus some of the more cringeworthy phrases are excusable. Overall, this is an fun read, and happens to be one of my favorites (though in no way the best).

3. Insanity (February 2007):

Yuki overhears something he’s not supposed to. . . . It’s odd. It's nonsenical. Another one of those Genesis-era fics, with no real plot or rationale to speak of, it's a silly little piece of crack for those of you who like that sort of thing. I'll admit that I enjoyed writing Yuki as a psycho, because sometimes it’s fun to take your favorite characters and mess with them.

4. A Song of Paris (November 2007):

A poem I wrote whilst being utterly obsessed with The Hunchback of Notre Dame. It's about gypsies and gadje (non-Romani) and the different values they hold.

5. Yuki and Kakeru's Cooking Adventure! (December 2007):

Yuki’s relationship depends entirely on his ability to cook. . . . Another humorous little story, though of better quality than anything else written at this point (by which I mean December 2007). Though there’s some awkward wording and adjective bloat, it's cute, it's funny, and I love it. Yuki and Kakeru are extraordinarily fun to write, and overall I'm happy with everyone in this story's characterization (with the possible exception of Machi, who may be a bit too friendly).

6. The Dark Triforce (December 2006 - Present):

The Dark Triforce takes place after Ocarina of Time, and is a Link-and-Zelda-go-on-an-adventure story, this time to destroy the Dark Triforce from Genesis, which is trying to corrupt the world on the orders of an evil(ish) god. . . . This was started before I'd even wrote Genesis and published immediately after its end, so . . . the beginning leaves a lot to be desired. A whole lot. However, as I began to grow into the writer I am now (and I consider myself pretty good, or at least decent), the story's improved greatly. The time between updates for this one is obscenely long, because I have to fill twelve pages before posting because I'm an idiot and decided that was how long to make the chapter length, but it's still being worked on, and will be finished once it and Genesis are edited to a reasonable quality. So far the Prologue has been rewritten.

7. Horton Hears a Who!: Moments of You (April 2008 - Present):

This story follows Mayor Ned McDodd and his childhood friend (and future wife) Sally O'Malley, and their budding relationship. . . . I actually have a 100-percent-or-pretty-darn-close-to-that good fanfic! Hallelujah! This is by far my favorite story (excluding The Dark Triforce for nostalgia's sake (and that the later chapters are, as I said, not bad)). Filled with cuteness, fluff, and humor to the brim in a slightly unusual and childish style. And I'm pretty sure . . . NO MARY SUES! WHOO! That calls for a dance of joy and celebration. The cover image is made by JabberwockyChamber17, who makes literally the cutest Ned/Sally fanart in the world.

8. Dear Marni, I Am So Sorry . . . (April 2009):

Little high school Forestwater watched Repo! The Genetic Opera and fell in love with Nathan. Since then I’ve grown a bit away from that fandom, but this story was an attempt to unpack his and Marni’s relationship, and the night Shilo was born.

9. A Little Glimpse of Leg (July 2011 - Present):

A little experiment in characterization and writing a story that currently has no plot but needs one, this bad boy looks at the lives of Animaniacs! characters ten years after the show ends. (Hint: it’s not very happy.) . . . . It follows in the grand tradition of A! stories that are horribly depressing, and hopefully it lives up to some of the more incredible ones of its genre. All in all, I think it's pretty good so far, and I'm excited to see where it goes. The cover image was created by myself, using the following images with permission: The picture of the Warners by AyakoOtani, the font from cooltext, the image of Minerva Mink by MawsCM, Hello Nurse by crazedg, and Emily (OC) created using a princess maker.

10. Hairdresser (January 2012):

Yakko goes to the hairdresser, and things take a turn for the heartbreaking. . . . Just a little one-shot that's meant to take place before A Little Glimpse of Leg. Yakko's such a cute little lech, isn't he? I wanted to play around with him and the other Warners as kids, though they've never really talked like little kids, have they? It was a character study, I guess you could call it, and a fluff piece that was just fun to write.

11. Makeup (March 2014):

Jack meets a young woman in a bar, and you know there’s only one way this story can go. . . . I actually wrote this a long time ago — probably around the time of Dear Marni . . . It was a bit mean-spirited, perhaps, as I’d written it in response to all those stories in which Jack Sparrow falls in love with a saucy maid, marries her, and lives happily ever after with a bunch of pirate babies; it’s a fun story, and some of those are quite good, but it never seemed very realistic to his character. So I decided to create my own version. Despite being fanfic, it centers around an OC named Catherine, and this is the only thing about the fic that bothers me. There was really no other way to do it, since I was trying to mimic the style of those Jack-marries-end-of-story fanfics, which are almost always from the point of view of the OC, but I never like to do that. I hope it isn’t too boring for readers, in any case. It’s fairly well-written, at least. (Man, I’m really bad at talking up my stories, aren’t I?) The cover was created by myself, using the font from cooltext, the logo from Google (owned by Disney, I’m sure), and the images of Catherine from a game called Portrait Maker.

12. The Countdown (July 2014):

Marco has to tell Jake something, and he knows it’s not going to be pretty. . . . Is it arrogant to say that I’m really, really proud of this story? Because I’m really, really proud of this one. It’s a little melodramatic, but as my beta said, “'Needlessly melodramatic' is Marco's voice.” Chapter “Zero” is possibly one of the finest things I’ve ever written, and while I know the slash is a bit of a stretch, I think I managed to make it pretty convincing. This series is ridiculously close to my heart; I’m a graduate student and still read it every few years or so, I’m saving every book for my children to enjoy, and Marco is on the short list of my favorite characters ever written. Needless to say, this bad boy means a lot to me, and I hope you guys like it. The cover was made using (with permission) this gorgeous image by Schreiend, whose other work can be found here.

13. Disposable (March-April 2015):

Lavender is known as being the Disposable Love Interest in Ron and Hermione's romance, but she always struck me as an interesting, sweet, and emotional young woman. I wanted to make her more than the "anti-Hermione," and see what went on in her head during (and after) her brief appearance in the books. This is what came of it.

YOU WANT SOME MORE OF THIS?!

I'm also on Archive of Our Own! Not everything here is on that site, and there's some extra goodies there that I don't have here. Mainly, fanfic of Rooster Teeth's Camp Camp, which has basically no fandom here but is alive and kicking over there. But feel free to stop by and say hello!

Or check me out on Tumblr!

Or hell, why not hang out at the blog I never update? I get some serious John Green hate going there, so it's a lot of fun.

By the way, if you feel like seeing more cartoon characters doing all sorts of wacky things, check out my brother Hotel Toon! I'm very proud of him — he's got a hell of an imagination and I wish I could write as fast as he does! — and it'd mean a lot if you could go read and review his stuff.