the green lama
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Joined 02-27-06, id: 998642, Profile Updated: 02-28-12
Author has written 9 stories for Lord of the Rings, King Kong, and Harry Potter.

Presumably you've found your way here through my stories. If so, thanks for reading.

So. I'm a student from the North East of England. I have a passion for music and languages, whether my own English or my increasingly beloved German. Writing is my guilty pleasure, because I enjoy few things more, but am rarely pleased with the finished product enough to let anyone else read it. I am immensely grateful to everyone who has fed my perfectionist streak by offering constructive and encouraging reviews!

Incidentally, the name 'the green lama' came from a song I wrote with my brother many years ago on a family holiday. It was hilarious at the time, but I can't remember much of it. I used the interesting new spelling 'lama' then and it's stuck. Now, 'llama' just doesn't look right.

If you have read anything of mine, however old and dodgy it may have been, I hope you enjoyed it, and I really appreciate you coming with me on my adventures into the imagination of my favourite authors. Any questions or thoughts? Feel free to PM me. :)

Danke!

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Jackson, Where's My Paycheck? by theharshlightofday reviews
A hobbit in dire need of health insurance, a bumbling gardener, a senile wizard, a klutzy ranger, a prissy elf and a horny elf maiden with a speech impediment… it can only be a shameless parody of Peter Jackson’s movie trilogy!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 33 - Words: 99,667 - Reviews: 360 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 10/1/2013 - Published: 9/21/2006 - Aragorn, Frodo B.
And The Woods Responded by WindSurfBabe reviews
Aeve did not believe in elves - nor did she need to. But when war threatens to claim those she holds dear, she remembers the old stories. Are there truly immortal beings dwelling in the ruins nearby? Can they help her? And at what price? STORY ON HIATUS!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 39,886 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 7/4/2012 - Published: 10/19/2009 - Elrohir
Seven by Bad Mum reviews
Seven characters and seven prompts. Percy Weasley, Blaise Zabini, Astoria Greengrass, Oliver Wood, Susan Bones, Padma Patil and Marcus Flint. For the "One Week" challenge at the HP Fanfiction Challenges Forum.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,819 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 1/5/2012 - Published: 12/29/2011 - Oliver W., Padma P. - Complete
Process by Celestial Chaos reviews
Post-DH. War-torn Oliver Wood finds solace in the one person he never thought he would. Slash. Revisiting my favorite HP pairing!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 23,849 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 8/22/2011 - Published: 11/23/2010 - Oliver W., Marcus F. - Complete
Healer by GalahadsGurl reviews
Morgaine is the sister of Arthur, as well as the wife & lover of both Galahad & Gawain. The war is over and the time for healing is at hand. GawainMorgaineGalahad. R&R.
King Arthur - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 114 - Words: 204,961 - Reviews: 618 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/13/2011 - Published: 2/7/2005 - Galahad, Gawain
Looking for Boromir by Valante reviews
When Faramir is lost, who will help him find his way? 3rd place Teitho winner.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,198 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/11/2010 - Faramir - Complete
Things Between People by sanchezkm reviews
A continuation of Complexities of the Heart, this follows Sirius and Anna through a brutal war against Voldemort and into the future. SiriusOC.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 34,082 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 6/9/2009 - Published: 11/4/2007 - Sirius B., OC
At Water's Edge by LoveWillFindYou reviews
As long as we are here, she and I, nothing can ever go wrong. Lost years - filled with lies and the corresponding atonement - I could take many more of those if I knew I had this to look forward to. This is a snapshot of the beach scene. Please R/R!
Atonement - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 569 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/26/2008 - Robbie T., Cecilia T. - Complete
In Arms of Red and Blue by sanchezkm reviews
Superman saves a girl, stays for a cupcake and gets more than he bargained for. CKOC.
Superman - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 15,510 - Reviews: 180 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 4/25/2008 - Published: 7/6/2006
Ask Me No Questions I'll Tell You No Lies by Ninja Stealth Noise reviews
20 year old Scarlett Harker is not your average rich girl. She's sick of suitors and limits. She's being suffocated and she wants out. Where does she go? Everyone's favorite rusty tramp steamer, of course.
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 31 - Words: 35,299 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 12/23/2007 - Published: 5/6/2006 - Complete
Complexities of the Heart by sanchezkm reviews
Lost and sick in the middle of nowhere, Sirius falls into the hands of a woman whose secrets will tie inextricably into the fate of his godson. SiriusOC.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 65,889 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 10/28/2007 - Published: 11/11/2006 - Sirius B., OC - Complete
Up The River by appletizer reviews
Jimmy takes a moment to press pause. Warnings: language, general emoing...
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,698 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Published: 7/25/2007 - Complete
Point of No Return by celtic elf reviews
When Evalyn Henley grows tired of being ordered around like one of her servants, she decides she is in need of her own life, independence and adventure. And where does she go looking for it? On the open seas, of course. EnglehornOc
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 31,224 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 8/12/2006 - Published: 1/17/2006
Shadows of the Island by marinawings reviews
When Clytie Seaborne's brother goes missing on the sea near Skull Island, she goes to the only people she knows can help her bring him back, Skull Island's survivors. JackAnn, EnglehornOC
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 66,132 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 6/9/2006 - Published: 4/8/2006 - Complete
Is That Eomer Chasing Faramir Down the Hall? by Nefertiri's Handmaiden reviews
Maybe PG13, but not really. This is actually a collection of stories explaining the title. Should you have any ideas for a future chapter, please submit them in a review and I will gladly base a chapter on them. UPDATED!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,508 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 8/19/2005 - Published: 2/2/2005 - Faramir, Eomer
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Quaffle and the Quill reviews
During apparition lessons in 7th year, Oliver Wood catches the eye of a Ravenclaw girl... This is a series of episodes from the life of an ordinary couple in extraordinary times, leading up to and including the Battle of Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 34,874 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 2/3/2012 - Published: 10/18/2011 - Oliver W., OC - Complete
Obliviate reviews
More alone than he has ever been, Draco Malfoy finds himself trusting all of his hopes and fears to a muggle he has never met before. But how much will he tell her? And how long can this new friendship last? Long-ish oneshot, pre-DH.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,220 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 10/14/2011 - Draco M., OC - Complete
The Dragon Slayer reviews
A short story about Faramir, age eleven, his relationship with his older brother, and his tendency to be distracted by dragons when there is homework to be done...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,109 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 16 - Published: 7/17/2011 - Faramir, Boromir - Complete
The Fugitive reviews
Sequel to 'Tales of an Adventurer.' 1939, and the Venture heads south to avoid unfolding world events. A new passenger comes aboard, but how can the worry of the Captain be explained to her when they are blown off course in the Indian Ocean?
King Kong - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 24,651 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/20/2009 - Published: 8/3/2007
Tales of an Adventurer reviews
Ann's cousin accompanied her on the voyage to Skull Island. Now, almost five years on, Jane lives in New York with her blonde haired, blue eyed son, dwelling on memories of his father.
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 31,064 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 6/1/2007 - Published: 11/29/2006 - Complete
In The Wings reviews
Englehorn and Jimmy watch from the wings as the events of Carl's doomed stage show unfold. But what part will they play in the evening that follows?
King Kong - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,318 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 11/28/2006 - Published: 11/15/2006 - Complete
Risen reviews
She is an Elf mourning a lost friend. He is a prince of men. He flees North, thought dead by his people, and the woods of Lothlorien seem like ideal shelter, until he brought to Caras Galadhon. There, an intriguing Elfmaiden is appointed his guide. AU!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 18,263 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 11/14/2006 - Published: 4/3/2006 - Complete
The Drunken Sailors reviews
Englehorn and Hayes settle down for the evening with a crate of alcohol, soon to be joined by Jimmy for his first drink. Jimmy is surprised to hear the Captain and first mate loosen up. Hayes gets merry quickly and discusses old flames with Englehorn.
King Kong - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,398 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/21/2006 - Complete
The Bat Cages reviews
The Venture has just left Skull Island, considerably lighter than when it arrived. Englehorn goes in search of a grieving Jimmy, though offering comfort is hardly what he's best at. Short, maybe sweet story that should have been included in the film.
King Kong - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 890 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Published: 4/12/2006 - Complete